Questions to SM's, How would you feel?
My kids SM's dad passed away a few days ago. My kids are kinda close to her and her parents. My youngest and oldest child will be going to his funeral. My middle child can't, he is in the military half way across the country.
I was actually thinking about going to family night or maybe the funeral with my youngest BS. Then I started thinking about it and thought I may be imposing. I am not best friends with the SM or anything but we have been cordial to each other for years. She has been in my kids life for about 16 years. Yes, we did have our ups and downs. She was the other woman but all that is water under the bridge now. We had about a year of bitterness between us. She has always been really good to my kids (NO, I am not a troll lol and Yes, I would admit it)
I am just at a loss as to what to do. I even thought that maybe I would just get her a sympathy card and just skip the funeral or visitation night.
I even thought about what I would think if BM showed up at my parents funeral or visitation. My parents passed away many years ago and I can't put myself in those shoes. BM isn't crazy or anything and I am semi cordial with her but I am not so sure I would want her there.
What do you think I should do? I am having a hard time with this one trying to determine MY place.
1.Go to the funeral
2.Skip the funeral and go to visitation
3.Skip both the funeral and visitation and get a card
4.Skip funeral, visitation and card just casually inform her sorry for your loss.