SK's Missing BM
My SD, 6 was in trouble last night for arguing with her sister. While we were talking to her about her punishment she told me that she "cries in the night" because she misses her mom. She also said that her sister (10) comes in to her room to comfort her and bring her a tissue. Is this something we should be asking her sister about? Has anyone ever experienced this and if so what steps did you take to comfort her? Or did you ignore it? DH and I have never actually saw her crying about missing her mom. She also said that she never gets in trouble at her mom's house so Im wondering if she isnt just trying to gain some sympathy???
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SS used to do this every
SS used to do this every time he was in trouble to gain sympathy. I would talk to SS10 about it to see if its genuine.
"If I turn into another, Dig me up from under what is covering the better part of me" -Incubus
My SD9 can turn it on and
My SD9 can turn it on and off like you wouldn't believe. I remember one day, her brother wasn't feeling good. She knew it, but never showed any signs of caring about it one way or the other. Then brother walks in the room and she says, "I heard you were sick, and it made me feel sad, I was crying." DH called her out on that one and told her to cut it out.
She plays the "crying game" all the time. I was crying because I missed you. I was crying because I was worried about my kitten. She never cries unless she has to go to bed early because she's punished.
In my experience, it's trying to get sympathy, nothing more.
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My son used to do the crying
My son used to do the crying thing at bed time. That's the only time he missed his dad. Yeah, right.
I tend to believe that my
I tend to believe that my SK's do a lot of things for attention. I know that BM has very relaxed parenting skills as she has often accused us of being "too harsh" with even the simplest punishments. Im sure that is confusing for a kid of 6 but she seriously acts like we killed her kitten right in front of her eyes EVERY TIME she is punished! I appreciate of all the advice. I really wanted to make sure that I wasnt under-valuing her feelings because they are such drama queens anyway!
"too harsh" because you have
"too harsh" because you have expectations at all, right? I was accused of child abuse because I asked Creature to "please stop whining". GASP, the nerve of me!!
"That's how women are, aren't they? We want to know that others have been where we've been, who understand our fragile places, and who see our sunsets in the same shades of blue" - Beth Moore
I think you and I would be
I think you and I would be besties if we ever met LOL You sound just like me. How dare i ask SD to pick up the mess she made with her rice. When she refused and said i dont want to how dare i make her sit there watch everyone eat ice cream but her since she didnt clean up her mess. How dare i make her sit there until she cleans is. The nerve of some people. Trying to parent. Geezzz
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I suppose that is the way
I suppose that is the way she see's it! You see, if she doesnt have any expectations for the kids then she get to be the "favorite parent" and I think thats all she really cares about! I told SD that the only way she will learn to be a happy adult and a good parent is by making mistakes, being punished for them and learning from it. Im sure she is too young to get the entire point but you have to start somewhere.
Your response was perfect.
Your response was perfect. Just be consistent with that mantra and don't worry about what bm is doing. She'll have amonster on her hands in 10 years.
"That's how women are, aren't they? We want to know that others have been where we've been, who understand our fragile places, and who see our sunsets in the same shades of blue" - Beth Moore
Right don't worry about BM
Right don't worry about BM or what she does in her house.
This may be true, it may not. It might be ture and she threw it in your face to divert attention....or not true and she said it to upseet you and get out of punishment.
Either way she should still be punished. This topic should be discussed privately when she is ready to open up, not in the middle of punishment.