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Hot House

Cover1W's picture

I get home tonight, walk in to a very, very warm house (too warm) and SD13 in her winter coat, hat, and gloves. "Why are you dressed like that?" I ask. "It's very hot in here." She says, "I'm too lazy to dress different... yeah it's warm..."

I set my things down and check thermostat. It's 70 downstairs which means it's been on a long time and it was set higher. WTF! Damn, they figured out how to change it. I re-set it back to normal temp.

Taking a deep breath, as I'm certain that it's not going to go well, I talk with DH.
Me: the thermo was turned up over 70
DH: it's really warm in here! (Says this with pleasure)
Me: it's too warm! I recently re-set it warmer and someone's changed it.
DH...steps back with panic in his eyes and instantly focuses on my annoyance. Why are you so upset?
Me: come on! I re-set the thing for a reason. Do you want to buy a new locking thermo? Or maybe you pay more of what will certainly be a huge heating bill?
DH: why do you get so upset about these things?
Me: because I have no control! And why does it always come back to me?!
DH: that's not true!
Me: come on. I should have kept my mouth shut.
DH: maybe I'll just pay more.
Me: maybe you should set some RULES! (I also make the suggestion that certain people have the ability to put on sweaters and socks)
At this DH shuts down and leaves the room.

Nothing is said to SDs. I put note on thermo. I ordered a lock for thermo. I'll have that installed on Monday. Fixed.


lintini's picture

It's so ridiculous what we have to fight for power over in our homes. Good for you for ordering a lock. I'd be such a jerk and set it to 55. But, us bay area folk think 55 is like Antarctica -40 degrees temps lol.

Cover1W's picture

HA! I had it originally set to around that, to warm up starting at around 4:30 or so.
But I re-set to mid-60s in late afternoon since both SDs get home before us 2-3 times a week; the upper floor warms up quick and I know that temp was good because DH and I would come home to it.

I'm going to set it back to 65 once that lock is on there.

Amcc13's picture

Eugh it's always our fault isn't it
I can't understand why people get re-involved with other people when they are
-not willing to be a partner
- not willing to be respectful
- not willing to parent their kid

I think you did the right thing with ordering the new thermostat
And I agree with lintini that a day in a slight chill may teach them how to put on a jumper
But that's just me - I am evil

Dontfeedthetrolls's picture

I got use to it being a little warmer in the house and he got use to it being a little colder. We both have a bit and our bill is more reasonable.

One kid sleeps bundled up in bed the other sprawled out on the floor with a fan on them.

I agree with you. Put on some socks and grab a blanket.

Acratopotes's picture

Blum 3 Blum 3 You should've said nothing to DH, simply ordered the lock thing and install it, and only you have a key to unlock it, no one else...

I did this lol... we have a timer on the geyser, it only turns on certain hours of the day.. but "some one" kept on over riding it and then forgot to switch it back, it was a huge huge electrical bill... I simply put a lock on and said nothing. No more over riding, I've not been to the house in almost 3 months and no one asked me for the key.... guess now that X is paying everything himself it's a very good idea,
he did complain the other day about having a cold shower in the morning and I simply ignored it... not my problem.

DaniAM73's picture

My DH is the same way. He wants me to be considerate if his children, but when it comes to them being considerate to me, oh please. I had to literally force DH to say something to SS15 about touching the thermostat. He pays no bills here. It's so frustrating. You gave me an idea about the lock.

Sweet T's picture

My own kid would never touch the thermostat w/o asking me. I have
MS and am heat sensitive so our house is at 66 degrees for the most part. I pay the bills as well. If they are cold they grab a blanket

Pharlap's picture

My parents made it very clear that they would stop short of murdering me if I or my sister touchedthe thermostat Biggrin . I will make the same very clear to both the skid and my bios when they are old enough. Blum 3

ESMOD's picture

My SD's were both of the variety to hang about in their boxer shorts and t's year round (we live in a 4 season area). They would whine about how it was "cold" etc..

Honestly, I prefer things a bit on the cooler side. I got used to a stingy thermostat from my parents. It was warmer in the summer and not as warm in the winter.. I remember wearing a stocking cap in one house because the rooms would be YSD is renting a house from us. Electric is still in our name (when we bought it, we spent several months renovating so it was in our name then). It was all she could do to pay us rent and a deposit when she and her EX BF moved in. (at the time BF and he was supposed to pay half but we discovered after the breakup that she had paid all his rent and deposit.. smdh.. good riddance he is gone). So, we just have her pay us for her rent plus her electric. Which she always has.. no problems.

BUT... when the first winter came around, we warned her that with her baseboard electric heating she would have to watch her thermostat. Well her BF and her just LOOOVED how warm the house was and continued their boxer short ways.. well, when that first bill came in at over 200 dollars.. she was floored since her summer bills were less than half that! Turns out she had an agreement with the BF that she would pay electric and he would cover cable. haha.. stupid when he would sit around all day and turn the heat

She has now learned to be a bit more discerning with her thermostat setting. When it's your own wallet, you tend to care.

notasm3's picture

I have the best thermostat -NEST. I control it from my iPhone. It's great to reset the thermostat remotely when we are returning home from being out of town. But it also has a lock feature with a pin.

MurphysLaw's picture

I have a confession...
When I was about 8 or 9 I gave our little terrier a bath, well, you know how little dogs will shake & shiver when wet?
So I turned up the thermostat to about was the middle of summer...
My Ma had ran to the store, when she got back lol I was the one shaking & shivering lol!

strugglingSM's picture

Ah yes, had a very similar conversation with DH last night. He always claims I'm just getting mad about "little things", but doesn't seem to realize that these little things are all part of bigger things.

I mentioned to him that I don't ask much of his children, but they can't even do those simple things, even with kind reminders. Someone has to throw out all the trash or wash dirty dishes, why does it always have to be me? It certainly isn't DH. It's been two weeks and there are still soda cans and game controllers on the floor in our tv room. There is also a prized sweatshirt with the child's name emblazoned on it (that BM had purchased, so I'm surprised we didn't get a nasty email) crumpled on the floor.

I still would not touch my parents' thermostat without permission.

Stepped in what momma's picture

When I was growing up we weren't allowed to adjust the thermostat as the temperature in the house was determined and paid for by the adults. If you were cold you put some clothes on and if your were hot then you took some off but no touching the thermostat.

Cover1W's picture

I am SO GLAD I'm not crazy.

You all are saying exactly what my thoughts are.
Only my dad was allowed to touch thermo growing up and I understood why.
DH did nothing - I know he talked with them about something last night, but totally privately, in their room away from me. So if he said anything it was something like, "You know, Cover watches the house...or Cover wants us to...or Because Cover...".

I CANNOT WAIT until I have that sucker locked down. Did NOT tell DH I ordered it (and a new showerhead for our shower - now no dirty thoughts people! It's a normal one! }:) )...he will not have access to the key (like the cabinets in the laundry room, only I have the key).

I'm about "this close" to installing a locked cabinet in the kitchen pantry too. But that's less of an issue for me since I've recently stopped buying much of anything food-related for SDs lately. However, keeping my food from being eaten may be becoming an I've convinced myself to get a locking cabinet in one paragraph. :O

Since the SDs have also made a habit of dragging extra blankets and stuff out of the linen closet and use them for various "tent building" and other stuff and then NOT washing them or more often, not putting them back I've got a stack of my good blankets in our bedroom. Have to get some under-bed storage bins for them so they aren't used. You should have seen me react when DH grabbed my YOGA BLANKET to give to SD13 when she was, NO!!! Get something from the linen closet, not MY closet area. Jeez!

ESMOD's picture

I swear they don't get it sometimes. Just because YOU BioDad/DH would give your kid your sweatshirt to wear.. or drink after them.. you CANNOT just go take my personal stuff and give it to your kids! It's like.. we have so little that is "ours".. they don't understand how we get upset when they give this stuff to their kids or let their kids use our stuff.

I mean, I have no problem giving (not lending.. don't want em back) my SD's a pair of socks when visiting.. or even lending them a jacket to wear or something like that. BUT, I want to be the person to make the decision about WHAT I give them.. not you.

And the under the bus "well Esmod wants us to.. or I have to check with ESMOD..." gahhhh. I know he didn't mean to do it.. but he set up the dynamic where the kids were fairly sure that I was the one setting limits.. not him.

strugglingSM's picture

My DH does the same thing, "we have to ask StrugglingSM" or "StrugglingSM wants you to...." Um, how about, we as the two adult members of the household want you to do XYZ. Thanks for making me the annoying taskmaster, buddy!

I have a wool blanket that I got in Ireland a really long time ago. When we moved into the new house, DH put it out on the couch as sort of a decorative throw. Two weekends ago, I come downstairs in the morning and SS says "I couldn't sleep because I have a sore throat and a cough" and he's lying on the couch, wrapped in my wool blanket! When we first moved in to the house, DH also rooted around in the closet and pulled out one of my blankets to give to SS, because he wanted "something soft". We have so many blankets that were DH's or that came from MIL's house, but now SS refers to that blanket as "my blanket". He'd probably try to tell me he brought it with him from BM's house if I asked him about it, because he also tried to tell me that he brought some clothes that he was wearing with him from BM's house, when I know that I purchased those clothes for him for our wedding trip.

Regarding the thermostat in my parents' house, my mother still rules it with an iron fist. My parents live in a place with very cold winters, but she refuses to allow my dad to turn on the heat before Columbus Day. If he's cold, he can put on a sweater...or just deal with it until Columbus Day. If anyone moves it above 68 during the day or above 62 between the hours of 10pm and 6am, she's like Sherlock Holmes trying to figure out who did it. There were certainly no little hands adjusting the heat because they were chilly when I was a kid, just like there were no kids turning on the A/C when it got hot and humid over the summer. It had to hit at least 87 degrees outside before the A/C would go on and even then, it was turned off at night.

Cover1W's picture

Oh I was furious last night. Still irked at it.
But the lock will be a beautiful thing and something for me to look forward to.

Cover1W's picture

Oh yeah. Heat turned up again tonight. Lock will fix it! Counting the hours. DH is going to pay the difference in the meantime. It's SD13 for sure.

Cover1W's picture

I bought a new thermo yesterday, one that I'll have access to remotely! Thanks for the help. I'm still going to lock it down I think... I have to learn how it works first because I don't want to constantly monitor it.