BM, since just before we were married in Sept., was on about me contributing to the SDs expenses and so forth, yeah, no. DH effectively shut her down on that. Then she got all into not wanting to pay for her half of their insurance premium (which is currently on my plan at work, because it's super affordable and really good coverage which I did for DH when he lost his) and why don't I just pay it.
I told DH that if she pulls that then I will never, ever cover them again and they will be off my plan in a hot minute once our open enrollment comes about (soon!).
So "um, Wow." Was all I could say for a second after DH told me this whopper this weekend.
Discussing misc. stuff regarding his CS payments and budgets, he says, "I didn't tell you but when BM backed off you paying for stuff for the SDs, she alluded to the fact that you could help pay for college or something."
WTF? Um, no.
This got me thinking that BM, who is notoriously cheap, is perhaps investigating the state laws regarding support. And maybe some of her family members are encouraging her to do so. So today I double checked the law and nope, my income has nothing to do with it unless I become a "parent" (i.e. DH gets primary or full custody) or DH requests a support modification. Otherwise, the documents can be requested but are explicitly left out of any calculations and can only be requested in specific circumstances.
DH will be relieved. But it also means that if HE wants a modification (he has 49% custody per the CS order, but it's really 50/50 - I've told him to track each and every time SDs are here and he'll have to prove it) my income would likely be pulled into it. And he's not going to like that information.
BM cannot request my information nor can she request a modification due to my income unless I'm fabulously wealthy or win the lottery or some other crazy income change - and that's also rare. And I'm not wealthy. LOL.
I told DH, "You know what, that means I'm for sure dropping SDs off the plan 6/30. I want zero ties to the SDs financially like that. No contracts, no verbal contracts, nothing. Has she even paid you yet for this month's half of the insurance premium? No? Then if she doesn't pay up, and don't you remind her, you made it clear it's due first week of each month, that also causes me to drop them."
She's very nice on the surface but she's pretty much made sure I'll have nothing to do with her any longer.