Health Insurance - When should child assume responsibility?
I'm a step-mom of two girls. The oldest is 22, the youngest is 17 and her father (my husband) pays child support for her. My husband and I still pay the 22 year old's health insurance premium. Her mother was paying half of it, up until about 2 months ago when my husband started receiving less income due to an injury at work. The girl's mom then said, "well since I'll be getting less child support for our youngest daughter, I can no longer afford to pay for half of our oldest's premium and you guys will either have to pay it all or talk with the oldest and see what she can afford". So now my husband and I have been paying the whole premium every month (approx $50/month). My husband seems reluctant to ask his 22 year old daughter, who works full time and doesn't go to school, to help at all with her premium. I feel that she should pay at least half of the premium, which mind you would only be $25/month. But it seems like every time I bring it up to my husband, he gets mad and we fight about it.
I just don't know if I should "suck it up" and not bring it up anymore or if I should make my husband make a decision. I just feel resentful when the 22 year old says "oh I'm going here or going there" or "i went shopping", etc. In my opinion, she's 22 and needs to learn responsibility and if she can afford to do extracurricular activities or go shopping, she can afford to contribute to her health insurance. I'm also resentful because the ex just put the responsibility on us. I'm not trying to sound petty about the money, it's honestly the principle.
Also, my 22 year old lives
Also, my 22 year old lives with her boyfriend.
This is a current topic in
This is a current topic in our home . Bm pays the premium for ss23 and sd18, who is pregnant with a sugardaddy of sorts. DH told her she should have them pay their own premium. Besides the fact that she is struggling with money these days, they can definitively afford it. I don't have a problem with older kids staying on a good plan, because it us very hard to buy anything decent on your own, but they should absolutely pay for it and be very grateful to get such a killer deal.
Same in your family; those rates are a steal and they should realize that and pay their way.
I know some feel the kids should just get off the plan, but it is prohibitive to get anything good out there. My employer pays 1,800 a month for three of us and they get good rates.
Anyway, I think you have every right to bring this up, because it just makes sense. Good luck!
Um she should get her OWN ins
Um she should get her OWN ins through her JOB! Why should YOU pay for anything if she is on her own with a JOB??? Stupid! STOP paying HER bills! :sick:
Yeah.. I stayed on my Dads
Yeah.. I stayed on my Dads until I was 22, when I got dropped when I graduated college! That would be the only reason I can see it being justified to be on that long: being a student.
If your working and on your own, and not being a student, she probably needs to grow up and pay for herself. Like another poster said.. being on the plan sounds great, as it is probably much cheaper, but she should absolutely be paying you for it!
My crap plan at work is 50/month and probably not even close to what I could be getting on a parents plan at 50/month. She should be happy that hes even including her!
I feel your pain, believe me.
I feel your pain, believe me. But you have to let it go. Your DH has given you his answer. He's feeling whipped either way, so let him stop when he feels ready. My DH26 paid for a cell phone for YEARS until SS decided to get his own plan maybe a year ago. Money is such a divisive issue. If the support went down by more than $25 than it's not much different. At least it's going to a good cause and not his exes mani/pedis! Kids are selfish and spoiled these days. You wish you had a dad like your DH. If you have an ex, you probably wish he were more like BM's ex. I keep telling myself, "I am being a support to the man I love, even if I disagree with him. Even if he is wrong and afraid of his ex and kids, he's doing what he thinks is right.
You can support you dh all
You can support you dh all you want but when it comes to money especially if you can;t afford it then it is wrong to keep paying. This situation is that the SM is paying as her dh LOST his a lot of his income HELLO! That mean SM is taking up the slack! So she has every right to say NO! good grief when you get married you are supposed to be a team and come to agreements TOGETHER. This way of thinking is only hurting the kids (adults) by not letting them stand on their own! So when they do get in a situation like the op they CAN make it be ok.
Tell your DH that either she
Tell your DH that either she starts paying for half of her insurance or she can get insurance through her company - the new bullshit thing is that you can pay have your kids on your insurance until they are 26 - that is just stupid when the hell do these kids grow up - I told DH that after next December since SS will be in college it will be time for his mother to start paying for the insurance and that we are DONE - lucky for him he agrees with me!!!
I think that if she is
I think that if she is working and living with her BF then she should be responsible for her own health insurance.
I appreciate all of your
I appreciate all of your input and will be taking it all into consideration. We will be having the conversation soon, as the open enrollment email just came out from our HR department!