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BM #1......... refusing to let skids call until WE buy them a cell phone?????

buterfly_2011's picture

So wow..... we got 3 hours sleep last night. SS11 and SS15 are back at their mothers for her weeks for summer. While they were here SS15 left his cell phone in his shorts pocket and it went through the wash. So he has no phone. I tried everything. Used the blow dryer... put it in rice but no dice. The kids have been back at moms for 2 weeks and we have not heard a word. I have Facebooked SS15 asking him to call his dad but still nothing. Well yesterday while they were doing something SS11 brought up the fact that while they were here we took them to a waterpark. WE made a choice NOT to take SD17 since she had refused to stay with us this summer nor have anything to do with us because of her hatred for me. The boys asked us why we didn't tell her we went or why she couldn't go. We expressed to them the reasons and they understood. Then SS15 said well if she ever asks I'll just tell her no we didn't go. I as well as SO said NO you don't lie. We will not come home and "bost" about our fun weekend BUT if she asks where we went you are not to lie to her. Well long story short yesterday SS11 was talking about it and SD17 FLIPPED OUT!!! Called SO and told him that was "their" thing NOT something he takes me to. I could hear her screaming at him. He told her how he asked her several times during the 8 weeks she was here if she was willing to work on things and each time she said NO. Her response was WELL I did try I said HI to her SHE is the one who didn't try. OMG ARE YOU SERIOUS???? So needless to say his conversation with her was her screaming and him trying to explain to her why would I take her (I paid for the trip) when she has done nothing to show me that she wants to work on our relationship? Her response well I would have worked to get my own money so I could have gone and paid for it myself. OMG what part of you didn't get to come because you are a toxic mean girl don't you get????? So he then proceeded to tell her she was not welcome to come because of her attitude towards me. And how would anybody have a good time if she brought that to our 2 days at the waterpark??? She screamed some more then told him, "Well then fine. You aren't my dad. You are just one of my mom's ex boyfriends!" And hung up the phone. Of course this hurt him deeply. He has given this girl 17 years of him. Adopted her when she was 3 and has been her SOLE supporter the entire time she was growing up. So of course he has feelings so he broke down. THEN the bomb dropped. BM #1 began texting. Telling us how wrong we were. AND that we told HER boys to lie and she does NOT raise liars or dishonest kids. BLA.... BLA.... BLA yet she is lying to the state regarding getting financial Aid... and of course her $1000 food stamps she gets every month. But hey she isn't a liar right? He texted her back told her exactly what we told the boys. Of course as usual this landed him a down pour of texts about how stupid he is what POS dad he is etc. He replied. Have the boys call me we can all talk about it together. Her reply was WHEN you buy the boys a new phone THEN and only then will you talk to MY boys AND I will be on the other line listening because you are no longer to talk with them privately. WTF.........

THEN.......... my daughter who LOVES SO emailed SD17. Expressing to her what kind of dad she has had. How HER dad bought his 2 SD their first cars and how SHE had to buy her own. How her dad got so angry with her because of a boy she chose to date that he broke into her home and threw something at her putting a hole in the wall. She said alot of other things to. Trying to show SD17 that she is so lucky to have SO. That he loves her unconditionally and he does what ever she asks (or use to) and how he has a big heart and WHY is she throwing it away? Just because he is dating HER mom.....

The fall from that email was BM texting at 1am telling me and my daughter to not contact her daughter ever again. Um.... ok. Then SD17 called SO and read him the email. SO said it sounds like she is trying to say to you that she knows how it feels to feel unloved by her dad BUT she is also saying to you look at how bad it could be? Well of course she didn't see it that way. She saw it as a threat..... ugh.

So here we are the next morning. SO has no idea when he will be able to talk to his boys. And he feels hurt. And I have no idea what to do.

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