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O/T need a good reply

brutallyhonest's picture

You folks are good when it comes to thinking up the best way to respond to difficult situations. I need help on the perfect reply.

Quick stories is a former co-worker who spend 3 years making my life miserable, sabatoging my work product and discouraging others from hiring me has apparently, 5 years later, decided to mend her ways. My star was and still is rising and her's wasn't and isn't, I've gone onto bigger and better things, have built a solid network in the same field.

Our field is small and our paths do cross. I have been icy but civil, for the past few years. I have built a network that has taken off and have not invited her to participate though several mutual acquaintances are involved ( though they aren't interested in including her either, she treated a lot of people badly). My business is heavy in trust and relationships. I don't trust her and she has been reckless with relationships in the past so she could climb.

For the past few months, she has flattered me at every chance meeting. All my comments are witty, brilliant or spot on. Everything I wear is apparently the height of fashion and looks awesome on me. It is ridiculous and a few others have noticed and commented on the over the top flattery. Last week it was a voicemail about an apparent contract she wanted to gift me rather than keep herself. I ignored the message and a few days later it became a text that it was a time sensitive contract and I was perfect for it. I don't want any associate with her, I don't want or need her favors. So I sent the most neutral reply I could think of. " I'll have to pass, thanks".

A few days have passed and now I have another text asking if she can meet with me. So what to reply now? I don't want anything in a written format that can later be used against me. So telling to F-off is unfortunately not an option. I'm not interested in hearing her justifications, the time for apologies passed long ago, I don't want to build a new relationship going forward. I want to go on being successful without her and despite her. I'm not interested in being part of her therapy steps to being a better person.

So any brilliant thoughts on how to reply in a few simple lines to make it clear I don't want to meet and would prefer she leave me alone forever?


Tuff Noogies's picture


"I have received your offer/invitation, but respectfully decline." then as goaway said "please use my email address for any future corespondance."

Easylikesundaymornin's picture

She sounds like that annoying gf who just won't get the hint !!

Stay amicable ~ stay vague. Stay busy ~ saying I am extremely busy with upcoming projects ~ I appreciate your thinking of me but at this time it is not feasible.

She will try and try and try again ~ stay "busy" , don't give her any ammunition to bad mouth you to anyone in your future. People can't get upset if people are busy ~ people can get upset with someone being rude but no busy.

Meanwhile your internal dialogue is ~ bitch you are beyond some couch time. My life is so bright I wear my sunglasses all day. Crawl under the rock you came from ~ I am not here to ease your conscience !!