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Stepson tells us horrible things about his birth mother! What should we do?

beachstepmom's picture

My 7 yr old stepson has been coming to stay with us during the Summer, Spring Break, and Christmas break for the past 2 years now. This summer he has mentioned several things to us which we do not believe to be normal. When we ask his mother about them she denies each and every story he tells us.

He told us that his Mom has him pee in a cup all of the time and then she takes it to work. We asked her about this and she said it was not true.

He told us that his Mom gives him Benadryl to make him go to sleep at night. We asked her about this and she said only when he is having allergy troubles at night. We have not noticed any allergy problems at night.

We knew of him being sexually abused by another child while living with his Mom a few months ago because she chose to not pay for after school child care and allowed him to get off the school bus with other kids until she got off work in the evenings. Because her boyfriend is a police officer he told her that it needed to be reported, which we agreed, and after taking him to one counseling session with CPS she says they told her he doesn't need to go back.

He told us that when his Mom and boyfriend fight that he worries about the guy leaving and them breaking up. He says they fight because the boyfriend (police officer) does not want his Mom talking to his Dad unless he is present and listening to the conversation.

He has been begging to live with us but Mom will not allow it. She says that he belongs with her during the school year and he can stay with us when he is not in school. He cries and begs her to let him stay.

What should we do?

Comments

StepX2's picture

Boy this is a tough one. Some can be manipulation by your SS but there are some things you mentioned that I wouldn't want to chance: Like giving him allergy meds to go to sleep and the sexual abuse, mom says she reported it and that is all there was to that? Was it unsubstantiated? Your husband has the right to inquire what is going on with the case. I don't know what the custody arrangement is but if your husband and the BM have at least joint legal custody, then your husband needs to be asking questions. CPS doesn't do counseling in these cases, they will refer counselors where needed.

sweetSM's picture

The pee in the cup thing struck me. I have family members who did that with their kids. Its so that if their place of employment does a random drug test, they'll have "clean" urine to use. Do you know of BM doing drugs of some sort?

beachstepmom's picture

We live several states apart from the mother, over 13 hours to be exact. My 7 yr stepson actually flies alone back and forth every vacation. Being that the mother's live in boyfriend is a police officer, she claims she doesn't have to answer any of our questions and if we don't like it we can take it up with the boyfriend! (?)