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two in one day....

AngeLily's picture

Submitted by AngeLily on Mon, 10/08/2012 - 8:13pm

So the floodgates opened and DH and I are fighting. (if you can really call texting fighting). He thinks I am picking on his child and that 7 year olds can't manipulate. Our 7 MONTH old can manipulate. He says SS7 seeks my approval...yes you must be right when he tells me on my day off I can go to work and he can go to a sitter... I can't handle much more of this. He doesn't back me, he makes sure SS knows it was me that took away whatever, empty threats but no follow through as far as discipline and WHEN SS DOES get sent to his room DH goes in if he hears him crying (LOUDLY) and says how he didn't mean to get mad at him. I thought My XH made me feel crazy enough. Feel like I am in crazy town.

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red flags's picture

Submitted by red flags on Mon, 10/08/2012 - 8:32pm

It's bc you ARE in crazy town, and DH is the mayor! Mine pulls the same shit. It's hard sometimes to remind them that their job as parents is to prepare their kids to be good citizens of the world, to be productive, well balanced human beings. Their job is NOT to win a popularity contest against the BM or be their kids best friend! Good luck to you. The guilty dad syndrome sucks!

Burrows72's picture

Submitted by Burrows72 on Tue, 10/09/2012 - 6:43am

Yes, as redflags said, you are in crazy town indeed. But don't feel too badly, because many of us live there with you! I'm in the EXACT same situation...step daughter and son, were both 7 and 8 when I met their mom, and they were well into running the house. I put my foot down right away...it was either that or leave their mother, which I did, briefly, becasue of them and their daily tirades and childish crap. But it was MOM who programmed them that way, giving in to their every little whiney baby wants and doing as she was told by them. It's been three years now, and the little brats are now big brats, and not a whole lot has changed. For me, I often feel guilty...step parents should be people to inspire and love and nurture (gag) their step kids...but in my case, I avoid them at every turn. If I don't, I will all out scream and scare the living crap out of them (which I sometimes do) It's a tough situation...you and DH have to operate on a level way of seeing things. Be persistant...let DH and SS know that you aren't backing down. If DH respects you, he'll have to stand beside you ultimately. Bad behaviour, if allowed to go on, turns into worse behaviour..ask DH to project that behaviour a couple of years down the road and imagine where it will go.