Should I back the truck up?
I have 4 kiddos my twins 19 are grown & in the Military. I raised them mostly on my own. My girls are 4 and nearly 8.
My man 22y/o girl, 17 y/o girl, 7 y/o son & he continues to raise his step sons 18 & 14. His ex drove a wedge between him & the girls they rarely visit. The 18 y/o is in trouble for burglary (& we live in a VERY small town) the 14 y/o is great & there is something about the 7 y/o i just don't like & can't put my finger on it.
He wants to move in together. It scares the HOLEY CR@P out of me. I have a no-nonsense approach to parenting swift justice with real consequences and rewarding good behavior with lots of praise and little treats. My bigs turned out great no real trouble with them except that I had to battle video game addiction for a while. (my girls are not allowed to own a game system they can play at other peoples house but I wont allow it in my home)
Because he lost his relationship with his girls he worries that this will happen with the others...he's afraid that the skids will reject him if he disciplines them & scared that the 7y/o will choose his bm over him. (BM never enforces a consequences the 18 is still driving & has all of his privileges ) The 7 y/o is a vidiot who swears like a sailor and messes his pants when he's playing and gets VIOLENTLY angry when he gets frustrated. He will get the game taken away for an hour & then get right back on even when he's been in trouble at school (which happens every week)
I love him soooo much and totally respect him for continuing to raise the older boys...( my step-dad married to my mother when I was 4 they divorced when I was 10 and he is still my dad & I am 40!) We are a great couple and we have a great time together and can talk about everything. He is sure that we can come to a compromise about the discipline. Maybe yes maybe no...
I guess I am most worried that I will not ever love his 7y/o let alone like him...
What I really want to know is if you could have a "DO OVER" would you have waited longer to commit or would you have chosen a different route all together?
Thanks, Alice in wonder Y land
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Thanks...I'm not much of a
Thanks...I'm not much of a vodka drinker. I think if he pushes much harder to move forward I'll have to put it in reverse. I like the way things are now and I don't think that I need to live with him to love him. Besides I love my alone time with my girls. I do not want to trade that time for a "Brady Bunch" experience. (we have all read the tabloid stories about behind scenes)
Having grown up with the most loving best step-dad and a his 3rd wife who accepted all of us and loves us I was feeling that there was something very wrong with me.
THANK YOU all so much for having the guts to be honest.