I'm sure I'll getting a bashing over this statement.....I don't even want them with him now. I know they're his kids but they will do ANYTHING to cause problems.

17 and 11 yr old twins all girls

My pastor says moms feel things different than dads. Maybe they do. It would destroy me if one of my children acted this way. His oldest has never been in our home and has only been one place with us in 2 1/2 yrs. The part I'm hating myself over is, I'm at the point with the oldest that if she wanted to come around I would file for a divorce. She has caused a lot of problems.

You sound JUST like me!! Glad to know I'm no the only one. My husband says I'm obsessed with them and if I wouldn't bring it up, he'd never think about them. His oldest, 17, hasn't spoken to him for 2 yrs other than to send nasty text message which he doesn't respond to. The 2 youngest haven't been here since Christmas. We are suppose to have them for a few hrs one night thru the week and every other weekend. About a yr ago they decided they didn't want to come on Friday nights, come Saturday morning till sunday afternoon. Then a few months later they didn't want to stay over night at all. few hrs every other Saturday, take them back that night and pick them back up for church on that sunday. Now they won't come at all. So they haven't been here for 2 months. It's been a stress relief for sure! However, we live in a very small town and with our jobs and hobbies we still see them places. They don't acknowledge us at all most of the time and if they do its barely a hello. I'm at the point I don't even want him to speak to them if they do speak. I know that's wrong but they have made choice. I don't care who it is, your child or not, it has to end. I don't know how you did it for 8 years. It's been 2 here and it's about drove me crazy. He says the BM has tried to turn the kids against him from birth.

How do you handle it when she wants to see him?