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meddling people, I wish they would just stop!!

momagainfor4's picture

Really no word from sd15 lately, after all the vacays, she found she was super busy!
Which is fine with me. The 2 weekends that she was invited to come she refused both times.

1st time, my grandson's bday party-- she refused because it's not really her family, she doesn't really know those ppl, they make her feel uncomfortable, it would be boring for her.

2nd time, just a random weekend-- she refused with no explanation. apparently she went to see a famous country artist. bc like she's just a huge fan ya'll!! lol whatever.

Now she's not even responding to my DH's texts or phone calls right now.

The meddling comes in with DH's sister. She played phone tag with DH on Saturday. We had gone to a pool and bbq evening with friends. She calls, he calls. Messages are left asking her to call later. She said she was just wanting to chat no big deal.

I think that is that. OH NO! She still calls him within 30 mins to let her know that her and her 3 year old little girl were looking at old pics of him, sd15 and sd's bm. Just thinking about the good days and wishing that they all still had a good relationship.

Big mistake that DH even tells me this. I can forgive ppl but I can't forgive this meddling bs. I told my DH to go ahead and run to town and grab the bm, I bet she's just waiting oh him!! I laughed. He thought I was beyond catty but I can't help it.

I would never call my brothers or sis and say something like that about a past relationship. Whether it was including a child or not. It's not my fucking business!!!! It's their's. I just wonder what she says to other ppl??
Nosy posey!!
My DH and I are very happy together for over 6 years now. I don't know why she keeps saying weird comments or things to him like this??

Comments

oneoffour's picture

DH should ask his sister when she is outing herself because she seems to have a big girl-crush on his ex. And DH should have some rules regarding what he does and doesn't tell you. Number 1 should be "Any of your family wanting to reminisce fondly about pre-me days with your ex"

IslandGal's picture

She obviously has no loyalty or boundaries and has no respect for her brother's new relationship. Living in the past brings you nothing but stress.

I feel you 'cos I'm experiencing something similar. SO's Mom & sis are still on his case about SD14. SD14 hasn't visited in 2 years and has a nasty attitude. BM supports her 100%. SO met BM through his sister so they have a long history.

I just hate the fact that they try to meddle and interfere with our situation. I know for a fact that they'd hate it if roles were reversed. I want them to mind their own goddamn business and leave this to SO and I to sort out.

Their interfering brings endless drama and more guilt piled on SO, who is pretty powerless against BM who is in complete control of SD. Just makes the whole damn thing worse, rather than helping. If they genuinely wanted SO to be happy, they need to keep their opinions to themselves and quit trying to rewrite history.

momagainfor4's picture

it's almost like we're living the same life!! lol!! DH met the bm through his sis as well. Also, they were never married so she is a true bm in all ways. She got pregnant after dating for 8 months. He tried to make a relationship work. As it happened they only ended up being able to tolerate each other for a period of 2 years before he started dating other ppl. She's a pc of work. The sis does take her side a lot bc honestly she just doesn't understand what DH has had to deal with concerning sd15 over the years. When he tells me stories, I'm just in shock.

The fact that he allowed all this behavior to continue is why his relationship with little miss princess drama queen gold digger sd15 is the way it is now. I partially blame him.

Of course, DH never owns up to his part, no matter that it might have been inaction. My DH's mom is passed away so I really think that if she was alive things would be def different. She didn't take no crap from anyone and she would not be ok with someone calling someone and saying stupid crap like that.

I told DH that he needs to go visit his family this weekend and make some effort to see his kid. And apparently his sis since she's being needy.
He just laughed.

Personally, I'm not interested in tagging along!!

IslandGal's picture

lol! Scary isn't it! In our case, BM came out as a lesbian after she had skids. MIL had actually suspected this to be the case loooonggg before they had skids..but when she tried to let SO know, he had on his "lust blinkers" and didn't see it. Well, once skids were 5(SS) and 6(SD), BM took off and partied her ass off for a couple of years..then settled down with her lover and reconnected.

SO's sis and Mom know this - hell, SO's Mom gave 5 years of her life, helping SO raise the skids when BM went AWOL. So she's also aware of how BM manipulates things. It took a few years for her to be loyal to SO. SO's sis just wants everyone to get along like her own blended family has. Sis has 2 kids and ex hubby visits and spends weekends. Her new boyfriend has no kids so I don't know how she can even compare our situation as she doesn't have to deal with a toxic BM.

I used to be quite close to her..until I found myself in this mess..I expected her to be loyal to her brother..but unfortunately, it appears that she also expects her brother to be a dickless wonder, take it up the ass from BM and now SD. Just goddamn frustrating!!

Next time he plans on visiting her..I'll make sure I'll be busy doing something..anything else. Until I am convinced that she is loyal to her bro and supports him in dealing with this..I'm not interested in seeing her.