Not a Step Father yet, I love my girlfriend but can't stand her kids...Submitted by step1973 on Fri, 08/27/2010 - 8:23am
I'm not a step father yet but I don't know where to seek other peoples help on this, I hope you all don't mind. I'm currently living with my girlfriend which has 2 kids of her own. Boy 9 and girl 7. I have a boy 10 and a girl 7 as well. My 2 kids are well behaved and well mannered. Her kids are pretty much... I call it Hellions. No respect, liars and can't remember a thing anyone tells them. I've lived with my girlfriend and her 2 kids for 1 1/2 yrs and nothing has improved. I have tried to teach them and raise them like my own and nothing works. They tell my girlfriend that they like me but that's not the point. It's that they are just out of control. The boy has ADHD, the girl just never listens. Together, they are a handful. They are both immature for their age compared to mine. My kids say "please" "Thank you" etc. Her kids seems to still talk like babies. All I hear all day and night is "Mommy" non-stop. My kids only ask for me when they actually need me as oppose to hers calling mommy about getting a towel to shower for instance. Her boy seems to want to talk about everything "that no one cares about". "Mommy, I got 2 pieces of paper today". Now why would anyone want to know that? My kids never did that. I've been around so many kids in my lifetime but her boy is so high maintenance. Teamed up with her girl, they both drive me up the wall. I've brought it up to my girlfriend and she says it's ADHD. Well, I can't stand it and it stresses me out everyday coming back from work and I want to just relax a bit. I can't see myself ever adapting to her kids because of their upbringing has obviously made them "rule the world".
I feel like I need to breakup with my girlfriend because of her kids but it might seem selfish. Am I wrong and am I a bad person for thinking this way? I raised my kids already and I don't feel like I need to go any further to raise her kids since in 1 1/2 yrs nothing has been accomplished. I thought I was able to change things by sticking around and assisting but it's not happening. Is it time for me to leave? The only thing in this relationship that I'm not complaining about is my girlfriend only. It's like I want her but not her kids.
Any advise would be helpful and don't think it'll offend me. I'm begging for happiness at this point. Thanks all!