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*twitching* Stop playing MOTY!!!

lieutenant_dad's picture

Backstory: My stepsister (SS) had four kids before she was 21. The oldest was born when SS was 16, and the BD was 40. The subsequent kids are her XH's kids, but he "helped raise" all four because my SS didn't tell him the oldest was someone else's until my SS had my oldest niece committed to in-patient psych care at age 5 (yes, 5) for throwing fits and being abusive to SS's BF (post divorce), who we found out later was molesting my niece and my SS let it happen because her BF threatened to leave her if she didn't let him do it, because SS told the psych hospital that BF was the father (he wasn't).

Anyway, XH moves to get custody of all the kids, but he isn't on the oldest's BC. Paternity test shows he's not the father so the oldest will be left with SS. He refuses to split them up, realizes he is in no way fit to be a father, and somehow terminates his rights. During this fiasco, BF leaves SS and she starts drinking and doing drugs. After the second time the youngest three, who were toddlers, are found playing half-naked out by the road, SS loses custody and goes to jail for endangerment. She lives with my mom and SF when she gets out to complete her COed therapy to get the kids back. She doesn't do any of it, moves out in the night and in with a friend, and the courts terminate her rights.

SS bounces around for a few years between BFs and friends, and moves to Alabama out of the blue. Radio silence, no one knows where she is, SF is distraught, etc. Everyone finds out where she is and cuts her off. Guy ends up being abusive, she flees to Kentucky, finds Jesus and a new husband. Claims to be sober but her new husband (who has three kids himself) males and sells glass pipes (yes, those kind).

ANYWAY, my SS has not had rights to her bios for nearly a decade. The oldest two just celebrated their birthdays. My SS is posting ALL OVER FRACKING FACEBOOK about how "Mommy and Daddy" (aka new DH who has never met them) love them and she wishes things could be different and she could celebrate with them.

I'm about to lose my GD mind on her. She LET HER DAUGHTER BE MOLESTED in order to keep a BF, and now she wants to wish her a Happy Birthday and tell her she loves her?!

I can forgive a lot. I can even accept that she is "sober" and "right with the Lord" now. But I NEVER want her to associate with those kids EVER again. She is the worst effing parent alive, and I am about to put her on public blast. The only reason I am "friends" with her on FB is to keep tabs on her so I know when my family is about to fall apart again. I have ZERO desire to talk to her, and the fact that she even ACTS like she cares makes my skin crawl.

I just needed to vent so I don't blow a gasket on FB and start WW3 with my SF's family (he is disgusted by his daughter, but his family thinks we should all forgive and forget) which will only hurt him.

UGH! There is a special place in Hades for her...

Comments

lieutenant_dad's picture

SS's BM (who is a GUBM like we see on here) adopted them. My SF and mom couldn't take all four of them, but SSBM (my SF's XW) promised my SF he could stay in contact with them. My SF thought it was a decent solution.

SSBM let my SF see them for a while, but thought my SF was too close to SS and would take the kids to see her (which was never going to happen for many reasons, but couldn't even if he wanted to because he didn't know where SS was for a long time other than the state). Then when SSBM started talking to SS again, she told SF he couldn't see the kids because he hadn't forgiven SS and was being too harsh with her, so it was punishment. SSBM is a narc and horrible person, too.

I hope to God SSBM hasn't let SS see the kids. I don't think she has, but I also don't trust either of those women...

moving_on_again's picture

Well that just sucks. Stuck with the crazy lady who probably had a hand in why SS is the way she is.

lieutenant_dad's picture

The kids are teens now, so it's possible I suppose. But I really hope they never seek her out...

ProbablyAlreadyInsane's picture

For their good! My heart breaks for these kids a bit... I swear I wish there was a way to get kids completely away from some of these crazies... It's not right to watch them suffer just because some crazy lady was the egg donor. Sad

momjeans's picture

Please oh please put her in public blast. Okay, yeah, just get it all out HERE. She’s not worth the breath it would take for you to do it.

How heart-wrenching.

lieutenant_dad's picture

This is why dealing with DH's ex seems like a cake walk. I've been dealing with step life in some form or fashion since I was a teen, so BM's antics are old hat.

Actually, BM dated a registered sex offender for a hot minute. DH and I didn't know he as one until he started dating the XW of a close family friend.

I promise none of this is a fable. I just live around a bunch of rednecks with zero sense.

Acratopotes's picture

YOu are way better then me, I would've said all of that on FB...

hey , when did you start loving your children, you allowed a BF to molest your daughter, you have not seen or talked to them in years, why now the sudden interest?

lieutenant_dad's picture

The last time I "talked" to her was when she disappeared to Alabama. I sent her a lengthy FB message telling her what I thought of her and her behavior. Her former roommate wrote me back and called me all kinds of names, said she had been a better sister to her than I had been, and that her dad would always love her whereas he only tolerated me.

I asked roommate if she was aware of certain SS shenanigans, and roommate had to back peddle a bit. Apparently, roommate was unaware of the molestation thing. She was unaware that my SS attacked my SBro (whom I love dearly) with a baseball bat when we were teens and almost broke his arm (SS always talks aboit how she misses her brother and doesn't understand why he doesnt want a relationship with her; all she wants is to be family and get to know his wife and daughter *barf*). She was unaware that when my SS left my parents' house to move in with her that she stole from my parents, so she may want to check her own stuff since SS didn't have a job and had to have gotten money somehow to get to Alabama.

Apparently SS was good at weaving the story that she was a drunk who just needed help and everyone had abandoned her to struggle alone. Shortly after she got married to her current DH, she disappeared again and came back to our home state. Her DH frantically reached out to my SF asking where she was. Apparently SS had never informed him of many things in her past, including disappearing to be with a new BF before. Her DH was shocked, but he managed to get to our home state and take her back to Kentucky. They are still married, and he is still letting her raise his kids as a SAHM while he works blowing those glass pipes.

*sighs*

Aniki-Moderator's picture

That roomie can suck it.

Bless you for all that you do, hon. {{{{HUGS}}}}