You are here

Can not stand my girlfriends 22yr old daughter

t_bell40's picture

WOW !!! You or some of you guys are where I would have been 15yrs ago. My GF daughter SD22 acts like she is 5yrs old. It is the same story however. She dotes on her and coddles her and pretty much gives into whatever her SD22 wants. My GF and I have known each other since 4th grade. Went to same high school and so on. Got together after 25yrs both divorced. The SD22 was only SD15 at the time. Most of our arguments stem from SD22 and my girlfriends inability to deal with her. I have 3 children. One is doing well. Lives in AK and has a husband and one SS. The other 2 daughter 30yr and son 27yr are here in west Michigan with me. They love and respect and converse with my GF. I have little or no conversation with SD22 as I can not stand her. She is a nasty little bitch. I have told my GF that her obsession with her daughter will be the death of us. So, if anyone is still listening, NO, it don't get any better. Or maybe if you get them young enough , it does get better. I will never find that out. Unless, Sophia Volgara walks through my door with a SD5. Then all bets are off !!! LOL !!!
»

FrenchPeas's picture

Yuck. I couldn’t stand my former SD either. But i divorced so I’m good. Lol

Hope Sophia comes thru for you. Lmao

SugarSpice's picture

t_bell, your gf has made the choice to allow her adult daughter to stay a child.

she must be getting some benefit from it. your children are wise to stay away from the adult daughter of your gf. no one needs to befriend a brat.

i have a brother who does not want his 30 years old son to grow up. they live together as husband and wife. my brother has not dated since the son was born and the bm left. she was a drug addict.

the two live together in harmony, and the son dropped out of college and stopped working. the son dreams of being in a rock band with a garage full of expensive instruments but mostly spends time on video games and social media.

your gf has a mini wife and its her own daughter.

google mini wife and see what that means.

Eve-Bee's picture

T_Bell, regarding the personality of your SD is it similar to your GF's personality? Just curious, since my SD is so similar to BM.

Hate this situation myself. Hard to find resons to stay in the relationship I think, based on my own misery.

Lol, the Sophia comment was funny.

t_bell40's picture

No. Their personalities are completely different. They both say they're like twins but, they're not at all like each other. My gf makes excuses for her. Her dad movied to Tennessee and rarely see sd22. Thats why she is the way she is and so on . Just had thanksgiving at gf's mobile home. I didn't make eye contact with nor talk to sd22. She went on and on about all the drama in her life. And doing this forced laughter thing. Uugghh
I will say this, she is a waitress and has maintained a job for 2yrs.
Here's the side bar, my gf is loosing her trailer in March. She was on a lease and when she applied to buy it , they told her she doesnt make enough. She has now changed jobs and is working as a postal carrier at 58yrs old. 40lbs over weight and 58yrs old. Yes , she is hating it !!! I feel so bad for her. She is a hard worker and doesn't deserve the sadness the pain and all the grief !! Because she is a CCA she will be working 7 days a week until Christmas is over.

marblefawn's picture

Judging by what you wrote, maybe the problem is not your SD but that your GF isn't hot enough for you.

t_bell40's picture

Well this postal carrier job is just the thing then if my girlfriend isn't hot enough. She is losing weight daily and is looking better all the time !!!! I might have to try and get rid of my beer gut......LOL

SMforever's picture

So many folks embark on steplife with the hope that their relationship will be just like the Brady Bunch. While we know in our left brain that this is not likely to happen, we still hold out hope. Problem is, a new partner with kids comes as a package with their kids, and cannot be separated from them emotionally. All skids are potential deal breakers and sadly the evil ones figure that out.

Just knowing someone since the fourth grade doesn't make them a good parent or even compatible with you. At least you know this, and it should not be a factor in your decision to end it. If you have raised successful kids, it is a backward step to take on her baggage.

Acratopotes's picture

your GF is the problem, she is choosing her adult daughter above you...

I would call it quits and find some one who will choose me above their adult children and with this I do not mean dis owning their children, it simply means I am a priority...

enuf's picture

Welcome to the club. I really tried with my middle-aged ss, and even after 25 years with ex I did not do enough to embrace ss. I hate sports and when my ss came over every weekend my ex would insist that I watch sports with them to visit with his ds. His ds has shunned me ever since I can remember, so there was no conversation with me during this bonding time. He would bring subway sandwiches for him and his df and I was supposed to just look at them while they ate.

I hate my ss and I want to get to a point where he does not cross my mind. More for all the abuse that I endured because of him. You would think that after 25 years my dh would have prioritized me. Not a chance as long as ss was involved and he was involved daily, his phone calls used to start at 6 a.m.. Finally during the last 2 years that dh and I were together it changed to 9:00 a.m. sharp and the phone would ring, probably because he found out that was the time I got up and then the phone calls would continue all day long.

My advice RUN from your relationship if your gf is prioritizing her dd, it will be that way from here until her last breath as she sees her daughter as the golden child that can do no wrong. Since she sees her daughter that way, guess is going to get blamed when things do not go as planned. You will be the scapegoat for both your gf and her dd. Not a good place to be. Believe I have lived the life you are living and it will never get better no matter how much you try to go along with everything and everyone. Your gf 's dd will see to.
that. You are absolutely correct "It doesn't get any better". Listen to what your gut is telling you!