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Drug Addict BM

lhouck07's picture

I have been a member for a few yrs but haven't spoke much or at all. This is my very brief bio. I really want to hear feedback, never wanted to till recently...however there is so much to my family's story that I should and could write a novel.

Four years ago:

I am a proud step mother of a beautiful seven year girl! Currently my husband and I are towards the end of a custody case. Her mother and mother's husband are drug addicts, and there is no visitation. The situation is quite sticky and sad but our daughter is so resilient and bright, we are very proud of her.

Update:

I am now not only a SM to my SD11 but I have a bio son that's almost two. We have gone through so much. Recently CPS and a new custody case with BM...now that she has been sober for 6 months and pregnant for 6 months. Things have became more sticky since last time I visited. While her mother has been shooting heroin for the last 4 years I have been raising her. I have also tried to make nice and be friends with the maternal grandmother. Our relationship was good until my SD decided to lie and say I had hit her. The whole maternal side called CPS on my family. Saying we were using drugs. Not only did they make over 10 plus false allegations about my immediate family, they also made false allegations about my siblings nd their children. We all had to take hair follicle tests. It was embarrassing to say the least. The maternal side knew that we knew they were the culprits so they decided then to use the barely sober BM to take us back to court. Nothing we could do besides allow basic every other weekend custody. She is six months pregnant, dilated 2cm and having contractions...we think she might still be using suboxne on top of it all. It's a disaster. These are temp orders and we plan on modifying them. However I am sorry for my SD even though she drives me crazy and they try to manipulate her...she is still a child and she shouldn't be going through everything she has.

Comments

Acratopotes's picture

Your SD is 11 - she knows the difference between right and wrong and she choose to take the wrong path...

I would simply disengage from her and focus on my own kid, sorry SD I helped you and you stabbed me in the back..
now I'm gone...

Thumper's picture

what can WE help you with?

A addict being sober for 6months is NOTHING. Did she go away into a Rehab for a significant amount of time....1year? In rehab she would have been taught many MANY different things. A successful reformed addict will make sure they apologize to everyone they effected DID she apologize to you and hubby?....just a little info for you.

My guess would be bm's entire family has enabled BM during her 4 year documented drug use. This combination is bad news as you already now. They still are, you just may not be able to see it or understand it. How many other druggies are in that family?

Looking back one could say Hindsight is 2020...meaning who ever agreed to visitation between child and bm's family WISHES they kept them at arms length with refusing such nonsense.

Sorry your going thru this. You may have to re-think how YOU want your life to look from today moving forward if your dh is not putting his foot down. Does bm have sup visits? DAD can stop gp visits unless he was court ordered to provide them.

(((HUGS))

Additionally I would guess you and dh had very little idea as to the dynamic of Maternal Family. That is usually the case----they hide things well.