OSGS

Disillusioned's picture

So DH, FIL and I picked up OSGS today and took him to his sporting event.

We had a lovely time, took lots of pictures, made a huge fuss, then took him out for lunch afterwards.

As we're getting ready to leave/putting on our coats, OSGS walks up to me and completely unsolicited, spontaneously wraps his arms around me and gives me a great big hug :jawdrop:

At first it was a little awkward, I was caught off-guard, but thought it was so sweet Dirol

I said "oh what a nice surprise sweetheart, thank you" and he says "thanks Grandma Disillusioned" then gave DH a hug too

This child's mother, my OSD, works to alienate this kid from me. He is now 6, but so far, her tactics just haven't seemed to work. He is still just the sweetest, greatest kid. I totally adore him Smile

Rags's picture

Fortunately some kids have a high level of emotional intelligence and can filter out the bullshit that a manipulative parent tries to wrap them in. Your young GSKid sounds like one of these kids.

My SKid is one of these too. He knew at a very young age which GPs had his back, loved him, and were his REAL GPs. He will tell anyone that my parents are his GPs and that he will go out of his way to visit and spend time with them because they are the GPs who invested in having a quality relationship with him when he was young and who have invested the same effort to visit and spend time with him that he has invested.

He also recognizes my ILs but they just have not made much of an effort with him due to a lack of resources. They have always been much more focused on their local children and GKs. They do call him periodically.

His SpermDonialGPs he pretty much has written off but he does mitigate some of their manipulative crap by giving them some props as the only ones who have made any investment at all in his younger SpermIdiot spawned half sibs and if not for the SpermGPs his younger half sibs would not have had any parents at all. However, he does not let them off the hook for their PAS behaviors and nearly continuous manipulation attempts over his entire life. They never call him and in fact did initiate any contact at all for nearly two years after his 18th birthday.

He periodically will attempt to spend time with them but as of yet they have never failed to try to badmouth his mom and I, guilt him into giving them money to "support" his younger half sibs, etc, etc, etc....

Every time he attempts to spend time with them they try their usual crap.

He told me over this past Holiday that he can only handle about two days with either my IL clan or his SpermCLan while he is comfortable and at home with my parents and the Rags clan for as long as he can spend with everyone. If his mom and I are visiting my ILs he will try to arrange a visit while we are there so he can enjoy himself and minimize dedicated exposure to the SpermClan and my ILs.

When his mom and I renewed our vows on our 20th anniversary near my bride's home town he commented that having his mom and I, my parents, and my aunt and uncle there made it the best time he had ever had in SpermLand. This both makes me proud and saddens me. No kid should have to experience the sadness and eternal heart break that my kid has had to experience when interfacing with any element of their family.

Keep up the good work "Grandma-Dis". This young man clearly has clarity on who you are to him.

Disillusioned's picture

That is a happy-sad story Rags, but I think at the end of the day, your SS loves and appreciates what he has with you and your family, and that is fantastic. You have raised him well, and should be proud!

Rags's picture

So should you. Your 6yo GS knows who his REAL grandmother is. Smart young man. He takes after his REAL grandmother. Wink