SS is not following rules
So im getting really tired of all my kids eating all the food in a day. I do not want to go to the grocery store every couple days. We established rules from the very minute SS got here. All kids in the home are required to eat at least one veggie and two fruits before anything else. It has been written on the fridge for a couple of months. So ive noticed all of my the kids have not been following the rules so i spoke to my youngest then spoke to my SS. SS came up around an hour before dinner time and started eating and i said you have not eaten a veggie today so he huffed and got some veggies out and ate them. Then decides to get something else out knowing dinner time is in an hour. I told him to put it back and he got snotty with me and went downstairs. SS has been leaving lights on and dishes out. Its not my job to pick after anyone in this house. So again the kids come upstairs and i tell them we now have a schedule of when they can be in the kitchen. SS gets an attitude and says is the veggie and fruit thing new? No its not new we have had several conversations about this and have told all kids that they will follow that and also not eat a whole box of snacks or bananas ect. Because there are others living in the home that may want those things too. SS has a problem with sticking to one thing and eating it all and not saving any for others. I called SS out on his attitude and he did not like it and went to his room. I really dont care if SS doesnt like the eating rules here. I do understand SS is not used to eating nutritious foods and it feels like a chore but thats how it is here. My younger two will eat veggies and fruits no problem but again thats how they were raised.
You have skid(s) with no manners and its time
Their parents actually address it
I would say either stop
I would say either stop buying the snacks or lock them up and you ration them out yourself when a kid wants something. If I had kids or stepkids like that I'd never let them into a pantry or fridge alone if they werent following the rules or were being inconsiderate of everyone else.
My ex's kid would do some of the same...he would go into the fridge or pantry and take the last of something that he wanted without any regard for anyone else in the house. Its one thing if something was made or bought specifically for them, but shared items shouldn't just be taken whenever a minor guest in the house wants it without asking. Of course these men dont see an issue with it, as long as their poopsies are getting what they want!
So I would either 1) not buy anything else for a while, 2) keep all snacks and foods that arent veggies or fruits locked up or lastly 3) let your DH deal with it only. You parent your kids and let him do whatever he wants with his, but that also comes with a price that you will step back from all parenting and not do anything for them either if you can't come together as a family or husband and wife with decisions and house rules for eveyrone. Good luck!
So, quit buying anything that
So, quit buying anything that does not have to be cooked. Buy canned, frozen and fresh. And only those things. Odds are, these kids won't cook. So... they will learn to eat what is served, and to otherwise starve.
We have been hiding stuff in
We have been hiding stuff in our room and put a lock on the door. We are constantly reminding SS to eat his veggies for the day like hes a two year old. SS apologized for his shitty behavior, which i appreciate. SS needs alot of work but hes going back to Bms soon so out of sight out of mind. Im ready to be done with it. At least when he comes for a visit he knows what to expect lol.
Sounds like you and DH are
Sounds like you and DH are playing games instead of firmly parenting.
Stop playing games and start parenting. Firmly.
Kid focused, kid coddling marriages rarely are effective in either raising children or as viable long term marriages.
Time to change your strategy IMHO.
Good luck.