I don't know why your sd having a baby affects your marriage? Is she living with you and completely dependant of you for financial and emotional support? Or do you want children of your own, and her having a baby may delay your opportunity for that?

You guys will be awfully young grandparents, but...it isn't the strangest thing in the world for a couple to have a baby at your age, even with a grandbaby on the way. Stranger things have happened...

I'm not completely up to date on your situation, but why would this be a breaking point for your marriage? Potentially all of our skids are going to be parents, and I know your sd is clearly too young to be a parent, but I have to believe that there is something else bothering you to make you want to leave.

Sorry you feel this way,
Candice

I am 32 now and hb is 47 so the timeline is similar. I so did not want to be at the hospital for the birth of her baby. The father strongly encouraged sd to not let me be at the hospital. The is the same father I've written about that took his own baby to a dope house. Nice guy, huh.

Anyway, I don't have any children except one that I adopted out during a rough patch in my life. It is weird being a step-grandma at 32, but since I'm not allowed to interact with the baby (this is just a way to be hurtful to me, not a result of me doing anything to the baby or any baby) it doesn't affect me much.

If she were living with us I think I would have left though to be honest. I would not be up for living with a baby that I wasn't allowed to interact with.

good luck and I hope your sd is less petty than mine has been.

// Susanna

"One breath at a time is an acceptable plan."
Ani DiFranco

Unless she is living with you and/or depending on the two of you for support I dont know why this would have such a big impact on your life.

I think you have the opportunity to love a child. And the bright side of this is if you play your cards right and are supportive of this girl emotionally and don't make her feel like she's a screw-up and going to ruin your life, marriage, etc. You can ENJOY this baby!
Not having kids yet of your own, I can see how you might look at it as bad news, but babies love unconditionally, and you could really have the love of a lifetime coming your way and you just don't know it yet.
It'll be OKay.

I feel so bad for you!!! I think you know what you want and need to do.
A little less Springer and a lot more Oprah!!! You will be sooo much happier. Be strong and do it for yourself. You can have a normal life.

Step crap is for the birds.. it's worse when your DH does not respect you or your marriage.

you deserve so much more, to bad for him, he will lose a good woman!!
"Better a diamond with a flaw than a pebble without one."

Only you know what you can endure, I can see why you feel the way you do, I can see both good about this and bad about this!

Only you truely know what you can live with..but mostly what you can also live without!

Good Luck..go for that pack of camels(lol).

" Life is like a jar or Jalapeno peppers, what you
do today could burn your a*s tomorrow."

but even if she was not pregnant both you dp and his ex may still be in contact.
Step-families are rubbish but you learn to deal with it in the end. I just don't get upset with everything my step-mother does.
At the end of the day I disliked my step-mother but really its was down to my father. Not being man enough to stand up to wife. He obviously maybe still loves his ex.
If you can't handle it then leave and get someone with no kids. I don't know either what I would do now I am a mother if my dp had a child with his ex. Think I would be the same but it also could be a good thing aswell. There were issues when I didn't want my lo to call my step-mum nanny. Which to this day not comfortable with it but if he does he does. My bf was the same as his mum never saw the up until she came back in may.

I hope you can either get past this or finds someone that does not do this to you.