my MIL so sucks dh ex's ass and takes her to lunch for bday -- may still buy christmas gift (9 yrs after separation)...(however talks about her like she's a dog behind her back and how she hates the skids living in that environment) and claims she does it so she can see the grand kids --- that is the biggest load of horse shit i have ever heard... in my situation BM would always let mil see kids on her time -- HELLO, FREE PASS...... but WTF we have them 50% of the time so see them on our time i sure would like a f'n free pass from the ass gnats....

oh man, this really burns my ass.... dh has stood up to her MANY of times --- just recently he went off on her.... in the past she says something along the lines "i know he doesn't like it, but they're MY grandkids, so...."

i would like to say "well if sil & bil got divorced would you be sucking ex BIL ass, too?" which would be a hell no, she would be on dil's side....

poor us, this treatment is NOT fair, but fuck it -- i believe we are all drinking at 5

i hear ya. ive been dating my bf for 3 years, and at the beginning his family were up my ass and had nothing to do with bm because they "couldnt stand her and hated her guts". now when bm has her depressed pathetic moments, which is OFTEN, she will call and text and have his mothers side babysit on days we dont have the kids. just a pathetic part on bm trying to stay involved and feel like she is wanted and part of the family. his family plays dumb when we dont call or come around as if they dont have a clue why. when my bf brings to their attention that its because of how involved they are with bm, its always "for the kids". just an excuse to keep up with bm's pathetic dramatic life. he has told them many times that we are sick of hearing about her everytime we come around and we just want to hang out and talk about something besides her. he divorced her for a reason, and it is completely disrespectful to me and him, esp him. thats her son!! its like i told my bf a while back, if he had no kids and i did and had an ex that my mother continuously talked to and did favors for a text on a regular basis, or hung out with my siblings, his family would not stand for that. i tell everyone, the ex will take everything she can get or what they will give. and its mostly his familys fault for letting her be that involved.

My MIL is still BFF with my DH ex-wife. It bothered me at first but than I realized I wouldnt want such a woman in my life. The reason MIL and BM are such good friends is b/c they both have a lot in common. They are both very bitter at their exs as well as still in love with them. Both of them are more concerned with themselves instead of their children. The both lost their houses and cars to foreclosure and NOT b/c they couldnt afford, but b/c they spent the money on going out and partying. When I started dating DH, they both said I was too young (5 yr age gap - OMG, right?!) and was too immature to care for the children. Yet I owned my own home, car and did it all on my own. I've worked since I was 14 and yes I may not have mother's intution but I've cared for her children more than she has but not given the credit!!

In any case, DH and his mom have had a rocky relationship. MIL staying BFF with ExDIL was the straw for him. He couldnt trust his mom or telling her things. He was eliminated her from his life and he struggles with that decision daily, but MIL makes no effort with him. He has a heart condition and has been in the ER twice this yr and she seemed SO unconcerned. I was tempted to ask her to leave the one day. If you're not there for your son, than you can take your stupid ass elsewhere! I've refrained from telling her what I think, solely b/c I want to make sure my DH is done with her. I deleted her from my FB and myspace b/c she doesnt need to be exposed to our lives. I dont feel mean for doing so either. I see the people she associates with and I'm not exposing my family to that.

I completely understand where you're coming from! My MIL is up Dh's ex's ass (which isn't even an ex- DIL, just a one night stand with DH which resulted in SD) It does irritate me only because she goes behind DH's back all the time with the ex and hurts him by doing so. She always says that it's for the child too, which is a load of bs considering BM never even has SD, but whatever floats your boat I guess. I understand being civil with ex's for the children's sake, which I am with my ex's family as well, but BFF.. NEVER!