Who makes the decision about what high school a kid goes to, in 50/50 custody situation?
When it's 50/50 custody, who gets to decide what high school the kids go to? When both parties want the kids to go to the HS nearest to THEIR home, so that the kid can walk home from school to THEIR home?
We have 50/50 legal and physical custody of SS13. He's finishing up 7th grade now, attending the same K-8 school that he has attended since kindergarten. This school is within walking distance of our home. It is 4 miles from BM's home.
Since BM's home is 4 miles away from this K-8 school and she works full time, so he and SD9 have to be in before school/after school care (on site at the school) on BM's week days. (When she and DH divorced, he kept the original house kids had been raised in, and she bought a house 5 miles away).
Okay, so not this fall, but next fall, SS will start high school. There is a high school also within walking distance from our home, but it's in the opposite direction of BM's. So this high school is 6 miles from BM's home. Too far to walk or even ride a bike (if he did ride a bike, which he does not).
Of course there is no after school care at the HS, so on BM's days, and she can't pick him up after school, I have no idea how she will handle him getting to her house 6 miles away.
What I think is going to happen is, BM is going to try to enroll him in a HS that is near her home and ask for more custody so that she has him all week and can walk home from school. I think whichever parent lives closest to the HS he's in, that parent is going to get more custody so that the kid can walk home after school. But I'm wondering, how does the judge decide???
Has anyone been in this situation, and what happened?
Does your school district not
Does your school district not have bus transportation available? I'm sure it differs from state to state, and county to county, or even judge to judge how they look at a situation. I would think that a judge would be more likely to leave a child in the same group of peers as opposed to changing them. 50/50 leaves neither parent in control but in our state one must be named custodial and that is the lower income parent.
No bus transpo for HS. There
No bus transpo for HS. There is city bus though -- I had not thought of that! Thanks, that's why I posted.
I think the only thing that may swing things is, his peers will be at this HS. He has been in the same K-8 in this area the whole time. Everything else being equal, the only thing difference is he has not gone to school in her area.
Why does is the lower income
Why does is the lower income parent named CP? I don't get that at all. ???? What if incomes change? Weird!
Honestly, I think it's a
Honestly, I think it's a computer thing. The computer makes them name one parent as custodial and one as non. So they choose the lower incomed parent as custodial as that's how support will swing.
It is weird !
Actually ours is as close as
Actually ours is as close as you can get. We have them every Mon/Tues. She has them every Weds/Thurs. We each get them EOWE and whomever has them for the weekend gets them the Friday before. We did the math painstakingly and it is 50/50!
This is perhaps technically
This is perhaps technically true (for instance my XH and I split 50/50, one week here, one week there but we also split school vacations which has in reality given me about 2 more weeks per year than him this year so far) but it's nitpicking. I think the two families need to negotiate about the school issue if possible.
Theres not much to negotiate.
Theres not much to negotiate. He either goes the HS near our house or he goes the HS near her house. It has to be one or the other. But yes we can have him walk to whichever house is closest and the other parent can pick up from there.
I just have a feeling she will ask for him to go the HS near her house and ask for more custody but I guess we will cross that bridge when we get to it! BM will see it as a way to get more control and CS. Oh well what else is new...
My FDH and his EXW are 50/50
My FDH and his EXW are 50/50 with his daughter.......During the school year he has her Monday-Thursday evenings, EXW has her Friday-Sunday nights, and then during the summer it rotates. They rotate holidays, and the parent that does not have her on the weekend gets one weekend day a month to take her out somewhere just for the day. We counted multiple times and it is within just a few days of a true 50/50.
My FDH and his EXW are 50/50
My FDH and his EXW are 50/50 with his daughter.......During the school year he has her Monday-Thursday evenings, EXW has her Friday-Sunday nights, and then during the summer it rotates. They rotate holidays, and the parent that does not have her on the weekend gets one weekend day a month to take her out somewhere just for the day. We counted multiple times and it is within just a few days of a true 50/50.
Why can't the kid go to your
Why can't the kid go to your house after school on her weeks and she can pick them up there?
I think if the parents are fighting over it, a judge is going to have to decide. I think your husband has a better shot at the kid going to the high school in your district since that is where he grew up and all of his friends from his now school will be going to that school. Its a good argument to make to the judge, and add that mom can pick the kids up at dad's house on her days.
Thanks... I like the idea
Thanks... I like the idea that the other parent picks him up from whichever house is closest to the HS he goes to so he can walk to somewhere after school, regardless.
It will be interesting to see what the judge decides. Unless for once in her life BM sees it should be whats best for the kid and not just a chance for her to "win", and she actually doesn't drag the issue to court. She usually wants her way or the highway and the only person who can stop her is a mediator/judge. We have been down this road with her before