Don't want SS around my bio daughters...

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Been married for 2 years, 1st marriage, love her I know she's the one. She has 2 kids from previous marriage girl is 14 boy is 13. Now we also have 2 bio kids 2 daughters ages 3 months and a year and a half. So I'm not really sure how to word this but i'll just put it out there. I don't like the step son cuddling with my bio daughter. At first it was like fine hugs kiss good night. But now if he is in the room with her he just hones in on her no matter what is goin on, and I mean anything. When it first started I was like ya it's just cuz everything is new. But it's like he can't help himself. I just caught him checking out naked chicks on the internet and he said it was the second time he did it. So now i'm Mr Nazi in the house. So he's at the age where he's exploring his sexuality a little bit right, but I literally separate him from her or do what I can to keep him off her all the time now. Of course my wife sees this and is like her little son could never do wrong. And maybe she's right. I'm just confused on what are the right lines to be drawn between step kids. ESPECIALLY SINCE THE STATISTICS ARE SO MUCH HIGHER in blended families. One question I ask myself and my wife is, were the step kids this "cuddly" when they were younger? The answer is no they weren't so why is it okay now. So I basically have been getting progressively worse and I'm to the point I barely let him sit with her on the couch now and especially all the crap I've been reading on the internet really freaks me out. I would prefer to be a super restrictive and protective father of my daughters virtue than have something potentially catastrophic happen to our family. Thanks for any advice on how to deal with this.

I don't think you're

I don't think you're panicking if you saw him looking at naked women online. What does your wife say?

Yeah, but still women not

Yeah, but still women not kiddi porn. The daughters a 3 months and one and a half. OP is the cuddling inappropriate? Or just affection?

I understand that you're

I understand that you're concerned and like any dad, you should keep an eye on your kids. But I'll also say I remember being 13 and many boys looking at porn magazines, Playboy, etc. He seems to love your kids-good for him! Many sks don't seem to give their half/younger siblings the time of day.

Your daughter's a year and a

Your daughter's a year and a half? She's a baby. I think it's a bit of a paranoid stretch of the imagination to see a correlation between his perfectly normal teenage interest in women, and his being affectionate with your baby/toddler. I don't really see the relevance between whether he was cuddly with his sister, who is just 1 year older, and whether he is cuddly with a baby/toddler. Babies ARE cuddly, and cute. He never had a younger sibling to be affectionate with before. All my stepchildren, including SS then 11/12 would dote on my DD at that age.

Viewing your SS as a sexual predator when there is no evidence is likely to horrify and alienate your wife, who you love, make your daughter anxious around SS when she picks up on your discomfort, and make SS hurt and angry when he realises you view him with suspicion. Unless your SS is demonstrating some really abnormal perverse behaviour I think the best thing you can do is calm down, and looking at naked ladies and cuddling your cute baby sister is not abnormal perverse behaviour. Try not to wind yourself up with a lot of scary stuff on the Internet. It's like having a cough and then reading a few medical sites and after half an hour you self diagnose throat cancer - the Internet is not always helpful!

"If he always clinging to his

"If he always clinging to his sister, you can say "Sean. Please. Put her down. She's learning to walk and do for herself and you clutching at her is stopping her from learning". But to put a pedophile label on him because he's physically affectionate? What is YOUR back ground...?"

Good point.

Honestly I would keep an eye

Honestly I would keep an eye on it. Don't treat him bad and judge him but keep an eye. Teach your daughter only you and mommy touch/see/talk about private parts and make sure she understands what a private part is. I know it's hard as she's young so make it age appropriate. As she starts learning to talk teach her to yell NO! If anyone touches her. And if she starts referring to private parts by a word other than what you and her mom have shown her I would question where she heard that.

I'm not trying to sound harsh but definitely worth being protective than angry and full of regret. I don't know if it's true or not as my parents divorced when I was 8ish and they were not saints, ugly custody battle. My mom used to tell me when I was 3 or so I would tell her my oldest brother who was 12 would touch me. I asked my dad he said it was lies, I asked my brother he said it was a lie. I don't think my mom would lie about that and I don't want to think my brother could do that to me. He was 9 years older than me my half brother from my dad. Either way the past is done, I don't remember a thing and I don't care to try bringing it to memory. All I can say is be protective of your daughters without bashing her son.

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