Do they ever stop being petty??
DF and I have a good history of issues when it comes to the skid, his 7 year old son. Skid and I got along great at first, and I had been in his life for a few years before his dad and I even got together, but when BM got wind of how well things were going, suddenly he couldn't stand me anymore and did whatever he could to drive a wedge between me and dad. He was rude and cruel whenever I was alone with him, including bringing up my miscarriages (prior to mine and his dad's relationship). I'm sure this was all at BMs urging, but it hurt nonetheless and I resent the kid for it, as he knew it was wrong on some level. Anyways, daddy dearest made excuses about how he's just a kid and I need to be an adult, etc. Etc.. a few years later and a BC snafu, and we now have a 10 month old together. I love her to death but wish I'd had her with someone who didn't have the baggage of a skid that makes me hate being home and feel like I have to hide away in my own home that I pay over half the bills in. Skid and I have been on better terms lately, but I also work a lot and don't have to see him too much even when he is here (custody is 50 50). I just walked out to the living room after getting DD to sleep so I could spend a few minutes with DF before I leave for work. Skid, who was on the opposite couch away from my fiance went and wedged himself into his arms the moment he saw me heading that way. They already got to spend a good amount of quality time together today, but the skid decided that wasn't enough. He even had the audacity to look up at me and smirk when he did this. When does this shitty behavior end?? I have done so much for this kid and I'm lucky to get a thank you, and when I do, his dad has to force it. I'm just sick of feeling like this.
It will never end and
It will never end and probably will get worse. I hope he treats your DD ok.
They're both good to her, for
They're both good to her, for which I'm immensely grateful.
What is up with 7 year olds
What is up with 7 year olds these days, acting like they rule the house? My SD7 does the same crap!! If I’m there, they act like I’m invisible, until she’s got a new topic to fight about. She’s not a sentimental kid, but all of a sudden doesn’t like me or me being around DH. She pulls the same crap with crawling into his lap or demanding his attention. Never mind if we’re sitting there having a conversation.
Im sorry, mama. This sh*t sucks. I feel for you.
It does. It feels good to
It does. It feels good to just vent about it, though. Wish I didn't automatically have people jumping down my throat for venting, but it is what it is.
Some of us here have early 20 year olds who
still have the same behaviour... how is it possible they can convince someone to settle them down
Ugh. I can only hope he will
Ugh. I can only hope he will have learned to think for himself and shunned BMs toxic influence by then
As long as his dad allows
As long as his dad allows this behavior and the kid thinks he is getting what he wants, it will continue.
This!
This!
Skid may act shitty but your DF is allowing it. HE needs to step up and parent.
Until that happens you will always have these issues.
Your problems is with your SO
He is allowed it. Not putting SS in his place??? Stop blaming SS for your SO mistakes
When does this shitty
When does this shitty behavior end??
It ends when your fiance starts to parent, opens his mouth and teaches his son about the importance of space, manners, and being respectful. Its not the SS its your fiance who keeps allowing this poor behavior. Address him and ask him to make some changes because its taking a toll on you.
He does when he notices or I
He does when he notices or I say something. Some of it he's convinced I'm just imagining and some of it he says is on me for how much I've distanced myself from ss. These days I pick my battles.
He's SEVEN. He's being
He's SEVEN. He's being manipulated by his mother, and his father won't parent him - and it's the kid you resent?
The shitty behavior will end when your SO actually parents his child.
Trust me, I know. Lots of
Trust me, I know. Lots of resentment towards dad, but I can't get over the uncomfortable feeling of being around the kid. I still take care of him, feed him, pick him up from school, etc. He's old enough to know what is shitty behavior and what isn't. I had mom trying to manipulate me in similar ways at that age and DID NOT buy into it. I u stand that the parents are to blame, 100% for their shitty parenting. Doesn't erase my feelings, though.
You had me at "he commented on my miscarriages"
How the F*&$ does a 7 year old even know to say that?
His mom. She and I have a
His mom. She and I have a history.
"Get out of my house, go
"Get out of my house, go stand your lippy mouth in the back yard until your father gets home!" "If you cannot be respectful then you do not come in my home without your father here."
Lather, rinse, repeat.
Luckily he's generally
Luckily he's generally respectful and listens when he and I are home alone. My issue is just the little things he does knowing they get to me. I am honestly just venting. I work 40+ hours a week plus go to school plus have a 10 month old and I would prefer my very limited down time to not be tarnished with these petty little antics. Step parent land sucks because there really is little appreciation at the ends of the day. I had to fund a second car, insurance, new phones, etc for all of us, and one thing I needed to do was buy a bed for my baby because she's outgrown the bassinet she was using. I wasn't able to do that because ss broke his bed (being careless and jumping on it) and we had to replace his instead. I'm just frustrated. I would rather vent and get the negativity out on here than in real life
A matress on the floor works
A matress on the floor works for SS since he broke his bed.
I get your frustration though. Ladies are ladies and they worry about things like broken beds for crazy children.
Vent away. And take care of you.
I’m just step mom
I have been married to my husband for 7 years now and we have a total of 10 kiddos combined. 20, 19, 17, 16, 15, 13, 11, 8, 3 and 1 years old. I have been trying to be the best mom that I can be to all of our kiddos and treat them equally. But that has not been easy. My husbands kiddos come from a background of emotional and physical abuse by their bio mom. I have been raising them for 8 years now 100% because their mom choose not to fight for custody and she started a whole other family with her current live in boyfriend. So I have become their punching bag, everything that goes wrong it’s my fault and they accuse me of not treating them equally and that hurts me to the core. Their dad doesn’t help much because he feels sorry for them growing up with out their Bio mom. But I love them so much and I just want this hurt to end. How can I fix this? Does it ever get better! Any tips on how to get through to my kiddos that I love them and that I’m not going anywhere?
I went through this situation
I went through this situation and spoke to my exSO about it repeatedly in order for him to step up and parent exSS. It took going to couples counselling for him to hear how much of a shitty parent he was.
One tip: We had a code word (dishwasher) that I would use when exSS would act up and exSO would be oblivious to it. This code word would trigger exSO to step up and parent the skid. Worked for us. The skid never caught on to it.