my stepson is an asshole!!!! Do I put him in his place or not???
My stepsons last visit to my house was on Thanksgiving, where he acted like a jerk. I didn't want him over, hubby did. So I had him over to be gracious...what was my thanks?? Him talking on the phone for hours on end, using the computer without permission (when he's been told to ASK FIRST)making a pig out of himself, and hogging the last of two bottles of sparkling cider, thinking ONLY of himself, and acting like a jerk when grandma and dad set a limit on how many cigarettes they'd give him. He wanted to visit at the end of February but dad said no as we live in the second-highest place in the NATION with gas prices, and brat wasn't willing to help with more than $5 in gas money. He was mean and manipulative on the phone when dad said he had 2 young kids to think about (his half-brothers are 4 and 8 yrs old)and said "that's just an excuse!" First I think dad doesn't owe him any explanation second, brat has NO BUSINESS talking to dad like that. I mean, I cant wrap my head around why he thinks he can act like an asshole and then just invite himself over whenever? :?
The thing that's happening now is brat called dad on the phone tonight and wants to come over and stay the night with his girlfriend. My problems with this are how I feel about this brat and his attitude, the fact that he eats like a HORSE, and we are struggling with our food supply-long story but suffice it to say we were hungry for a month and a half due to being screwed with foodstamps and a move and are still trying to get reserve supplies in, plus due to hubby's health conditions I have to keep junk to a minimum-meaning any sale I find on healthy foods I have to pounce on. Another is we are a 4 person family living in a 2 bedroom apartment...2 grown kids taking up space in my small living room aint my cuppa tea. When brat asked dad about this visit, dad said "my wife wouldn't go for it" (I was told what he asked after he got off the phone) and I could hear brat shouting "that's f*@^ing bull#%^$T!" and who knows what else-I left the room.
Am I wrong to not want this brat to visit after the crap he's pulled, at least not for several months? When I bring up how he acted at turkey day to hubby, he says it was a "long time ago" and I need to "get over it". I dont consider 3 months ago a "long time ago" and how do I "get over it" when I have ZERO reason to believe he'll act any different on another visit? Dads attitude is "well that's what I have to put up with to see my son."
I realize he wants to see his son but it shouldn't mean we have to put up with his BS...I am soooo tempted to put this little shit in his place but wondering if it would just make hubby more defensive of him. Help please.