Help please - BM forcing me to stay away from home while SS9 visits dad
HI, I am at the end of my tether with my SS9 and BM. I have been in my SS life for nearly 3 years now, he comes to stay with us every other weekend Friday to Sunday. We get on great and I babysit him on Saturday mornings while his dad (my partner works). The only issues we ever have are regarding mealtimes. He ALWAYS has to cause a drama regarding his meal complaining he doesn't like it even though he's ate the same things before.
I try to treat him the same as I did my own kids when they were young (my kids are aged 23, 21 and 19 and dont live with us), I buy him treats, spend time with him and do loads of fun stuff, however I also discipline the same so when he complains about food I basically say if he's not going to eat it he can go without (like I say we know he likes the meals because he's eaten it before).
The issue I have at the moment is this, on Easter Sunday my partner spent hours cooking a lovely roast dinner, SS just pushed the knife and fork (which he still does not know how to use properly) around his plate and refused to eat it. Things got quite irrate and I souted at him and sent him to his room.
He's now gone home and told his BM that he's scared of me, she wouldn;t allow him to visit when he was last to due to but she's given in and said he can come this weekend - IF I'M NOT THERE. So basically I've had to book a hotel room and now have to wait until a 9 year old gives me permission to come home. I'm at my wits end, me and my partner had a massive row about yesterday because he thinks I should just go along with what she says so that he can see his son, I get that but I dont see why I have to basically get home from work on Friday evening, go home and pack a bag and leave until SS decides I'm allowed back in. I honestly feel that if I didn't love my partner so much I would pack up and walk away for good.