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Court... custody hearing... not sure?!?!?

stepmomsoon's picture
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Last month we had court - due to BM (at the end of the school year) deciding to move over an hour away and pretty much not caring who got the kids - she "wasn't going to" and "couldn't afford to" fight for them and they have a say in where they live... blah blah blah..

Almost 2 months later, nothing has been resolved: no schedule, no support, nothing.. she has bailed and contributed nothing more than headaches and problems with the occasional weekend overnight visit.. where the kids are texting her at 3am wanting to know where she is and when she will be home.

We had court at the end of June.. it was a joke - nothing accomplished, nothing said about next steps, what to expect.. just the date of another hearing. The judge said something about mediation, but it is no longer free in our county and you would have to hire a lawyer and pay for it on your own.. so that isn't an option.

Now we have round 2 of this mess. We can't afford an attorney as now having two teenage boys full time, sports and everything else has pushed our budget to the max - so DH and I are trying to learn and do all this legal stuff on our own. Fun, fun, fun..

Court is later this week.. allegedly they are going to "interview the boys" and we are allowed to bring witnesses..?

I have no clue.. seriously. The courts gave us paperwork, but it tells you very little about what to expect, prepare for.. when you call the courts, they can't tell you much because they "can't give you legal advice".. but it's not legal advice we are seeking.. just advice on what to expect.

Why is there even a hearing if the mom doesn't care?

Will we know the decision immediately - or will this drag out another 2 months until the kids are back in school..?

This all just sucks and it's a life changing event - yet we are kept in the dark for the most part..

Has anyone gone through this? Any advice on how to prepare - what to expect

amber3902's picture

The courts can't tell you what to expect because they would have make a prediction on how a judge would rule based on the facts of your particular case. That's basically something only a lawyer with experience in family court and knowledge of the judge in your case would be able to do. The court officials don't have the time or knowledge to do this and that's why they give you the excuse they can't "give out legal advice".

I was a secretary in a law firm and the clients would want me to tell them what was going on in their case, or explain why something was taking so long to get done. We also gave the standard answer - "can't give out legal advice" because we didn't know the particulars of the person's case and really didn't know what to tell them.

Best thing to do is to post your questions on a divorce forum. You'd get some pretty good help on there.

simply_monica's picture

What state do you live in? In a lot of counties, they have free legal aid. You can google it and see where your closest office is.

SanAntonioSoccerMom's picture

Modifying a decree is stressful, lengthy, and expensive. Hang in there.