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Venting - new to forum

BMann84's picture

I have been wishing I had somewhere to vent about some issues for awhile now. For whatever reason I never tried to really reach out to anyone to help me find somewhere but I finally did and I'm am so happy that I did.
Here's kind of a run down of my situation. I have been with FDH for almost 3 years now and have been an active part of SD's life since pretty much the beginning. BM cheated on FDH which was the final end of their relationship, that had been on and off from the very start. They got pregnant and got married because they were pregnant. FDH has always been the one who had SD the majority of the time. Prior to SD starting kindergarten they did 50/50 time. Even then we(he) would have SD for 2-3 weeks at a time and BM would still only keep her for a week at a time. Whenever anything at all happens to BM she just can't handle SD and "ships" her to Daddy's. When they finally got the divorce finalized they agreed to continue 50/50 but if one of them moved out of the school disctrict then the one who stayed would get SD during the weeks. Guess what BM moved out of the district maybe a couple of weeks before school started and FDH decided to give her a chance and let SD stay with her. The stipulations on his end were that SD wouldn't be moved around to different schools. BM is not very stable and about every 6 months she is moving or something. Well christmas break came this year and surprise surprise BM got kicked out of her grandmas and technically didn't have anywhere to live. She only saw SD one night a week during her two weeks off school and didn't even have presents for her - supposively they were still at her Grandmas and she couldn't go pick them up. She also didn't do anything for SD's birthday this past year but thats a different time. BM called FDH at the beginning of break and told him that we could just keep SD for the rest of the school year. So me being proactive with situations contacted the school and started to get her reenrolled - oh yeah she was already enrolled at the beginning of the year but didn't go bc of BM moving. Not even 2 days later she changes her mind and decides against us having SD. Finally at the end of the last week of break FDH calls her and has to "convince" her that the best thing for SD would be for her to be in a stable home. I was completely taken aback that a mother would have to be convinced that her child having a home would be the best thing. FDH told BM that we did not want to keep SD from her ever and that as long as BM could get a job and a stable place to live that we would be willing to let her have SD back next school year, which kind of irriatates me bc I hate that SD is going to be suffled around so much, but he is her parent not me. As all of you know it is going to be summer before we know it and BM still doesn't have a job or of course a place to live. When she gets SD on the weekends we only guess where they are staying on any given night. OK this has been long enough. I have plenty of other stuff but will touch on that in a different posting!!
P.S. sorry about any spelling