BM's dd (SO's exsd) stole 3 necklaces from us the 1 and last time she stayed here. the first 2 were noticed gone right away and BM said she'd look found 2 of them and was going to return them eventually had to have the cops call her to return them. the 3rd was noticed about a week later BM ignored us on it said she'd look and nothing. When SO's kids came yesterday his dd said exsd had it and BM had taken it from her after school when she said it was from a friend. I had to threaten cops again to even get a response this time and she said it would be returned when she got the kids. (she could of return it when she brought them) I requested a letter of apology since we know she won't punish her dd, my kids steal they will answer to the police then me. I will request my children be questioned handcuffed and sat in the back of the car at the least.
You've attempted everything else next call I'd go with the police. Let him know this is exactly what you will do and he will be arrested and you can charge him then it's up to his bio's what to do.

Tell him to bring you his favorite three things he has at your place (best to do this before he knows he has been caught doing simething wrong). Then once he brings you those things sit his fav stuff infront of him at a table. Then, tell him you know he has stolen & that this will no longer be tolerated. Have a talk with him about what hes done, how bad it is to steal, etc.

Next you get in the car with him. Bring along those favorite things. Make him hand over his stuff to a donation center as his punishment. There is NO more chances ar this point. He keeps continuing to steal, he will now loose his stuff!!! No ands, ifs or butts. Its permanately gone.

Worked for us!!

Why don't you have a lock on your bedroom/bathroom/closet or whatever place he's stealing your things from? I don't have this problem with ss10 but he absolutely knows that he has to ask permission to come into DH & I's bedroom, bathroom, etc. He never touches our things without asking and I've gone so far as to put my name on food (Long story short, I have a food allergy that causes my throat to close. Food to accommodate this is incredibly expensive. ss10 thought nothing of eating it when we had non-allergen food he could have eaten just as easily) and things I didn't want him touching.

Drive him to the Police station, tell them what he's been up to, ask if they can put him in a cell for 10 mins or so lol, then get an officer to explain how his life will be if he continues to steal.

oooh oooh - you can try what DH did when SS6 was stealing and caught telling my BD7 how he was going to do it again because that is how you get what you want when mom or dad say no at the store.....

ME: Hey DH, did you talk to SS6 about the incident?
DH: I talked to BM.
ME: OK, so I am going to talk to BD7 so she understands that stealing is wrong (duh - her response to SS6 when he was telling her what to do was, SS6! That is Stealing!!! - which is why it caught my ear in the first place)
DH: Umhum - well I don't want to bring it up, he might get upset and I don't want him to feel bad.

ME: Too in shock to compute a sentance - :jawdrop: Just walk away - back out slowly and walk away

I took EVERYTHING out of ss9 bedroom except his bed and books. The first weekend he was grounded the entire time so he sat in there reading. The next weekend he was grounded one day and allowed out the next with strict stipulations. I also gave his DS to his sister. He really has nothing right now. He has to earn back one toy a week and so far that was 3 months ago and he hasnt stolen anything since. But I do MEAN there was not 1 single toy in his room.

I can't speak for all children that steal, but I can speak for myself. I stole things as a child. I remember one time my mom made me take the toy back to the place that I stole it from, and tell the old man behind the counter that I had stolen it. That was pretty mortifying...but that only works if they steal from someone else! I'm trying to think of what I would do if/when SD7 steals from me...I think a stern talk with just me and her would get the point across, but I guess you don't know till you're there.

At our house, they are grounded to their rooms - no toys, only books. This varies by age from a couple of days to a month. They have to pay restitution to whomever they took something from AND return the item.

ie: DD8 (then 6) stole $1 from a classmate to buy a treat at school. She had to appologize in front of her entire class and give the girl $2 from her allowance (return the $1, and pay restitution). When she recently took DS4's magazine and drew all over it and hid it in her room, she was grounded for 2 days and will have to pay for his new subscription to the magazine. She also lost the privilege of having writing utensils in her room - probably for about 4-6 months.

SS13 stole DD8's DS and played it for 2 nights when he was supposed to be in bed.. He had to return the DS. Was grounded for a week. Lost his electronic privileges for a month and had to buy her a pack of styluses (she lost hers). We have discussed making him a neon colored shirt that says "I steal video games and other electronics" on it as this has been an ongoing problem since he was at least 5.