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Older kid watching younger one when sick

ladybug1974's picture

Do you think its normal that my BF ex keeps the 14 year old out of school to watch the 7 year old when ill ? she doesnt want to miss work, mind you she makes over 100,000 a year and her bouyfreind makes 3 times that. With that money could she not hire a babysitter and leave the 14 yaer old alone ?  I find it wrong ( is it illegaal ? )  She is so selfish. The older son watches him so often i find it very unfair, He is kid he needs to be kid not a father.  Mind you there is a man in the house . His ex works Sat always have and the 14 year watches him as well, i feel like its not fair to the 14 year, he need to do 14 yaer old things, he doesnt play any sports doesnt do anything ,but drags his smaller brother around evreywhwere. With spring break here i know for a fact he will be home with him all day long. I do not feel thats right, he didnt sign up to be dad, hes just a kid. 

Harry's picture

Unless you understand that, you will cause your own problems.  Unfortunately it's non of your business.  The kids have two parents, you are not one of them 

ladybug1974's picture

your right... we were just concerned as the 14 eyar old doesnt have the best grades,, and he was pulled out of school a bunch of times to watch the smaller one 

Dc3sc2's picture

I don't really have much advice on this issue but realised most comments say it's not your business. I do however understand where you are coming from a 14 year old should not be kept from attending school to look after younger siblings it is not the 14 year olds responsibility to miss out on his education to babysit. It is wrong and illegal for a child to miss school to babysit. However I don't think there's much you can do about it. Your partner could contact the school and possibly arrange a meeting about it? I'm assuming your not in uk? We have very different rules here and a child's attendance at school here is closely monitored and other agencies are called in the event a child misses school for something other than sickness (their own sickness not a younger siblings) if your partner wants his child in school during those days is it possible to offer to have the younger one 50% of the time they're sick and bm have the other 50%? I don't know how possible that would be for your family though 

Thumper's picture

Is it, Has this occured more than 2 times?

How does bf make 300k a year? Weed?

Your dh can talk to SS's guidance counselor. Plus talk to his teachers. That should get the ball rolling LOLOLOL

PETRONELLA---come on. Its one thing to stay out of bm's business ALL together different when she has yanked idh's kid to missing school because she refuses to take off work... THAT is not ok.

BM's decision was unilateral in nature. 1time---could be dismissed as a "POOR CHOICE". (barf)

.but remember,  Dad has rights to medical, education and religion. SS didnt miss school because he was ill or even because he knocked off---he missed school because his mom made him.

 BM forgot that I bet.

DH lawyer may have some fun with this one.



SS should NOT be missing school what so ever to take care of an ill sibling.



ladybug1974's picture

his ex wife makes 133, 000 and her boyfriends makes 3 times that, she is RMT and he owns the place and a RMT hmself.

ladybug1974's picture

it hgas happened way more then 2 times.. its happens very often. and soory i hit reply to wrong message. she makes 133,000 and makes 3 times that as he owns the clinic and is a RMT himself. 

ladybug1974's picture

weed ? hahaha not a bad idea we are in BC lol .. i could get a nicer car, other then this crap that i smack like the fonz to start everyday lol 

tog redux's picture

As the father, if he has educational rights, I think it's reasonable for him to try to talk to BM about it first, ie, hey, I think Jr. is falling behind because of the missed school.  If she tells him to pound sand, then he should go to the school and let them know he is not in agreement with his ex pulling Jr. out of school to babysit and he's tried to address it with her.  He can suggest they give consequences to Jr and follow whatever their protocol is for absences.

And if it continues, he can go to court, if he has the energy to fight this Uber-Rich massage therapist.

somethingwicked's picture

Those two ,I mean massage therapists ..could  afford a professional live-in  AuPair to care for the sickly 7 year old. 

What is most  sick in this situation is the bioho regularly foisting her  parental responsibility in the care of a 7 year old onto a young teen. Is the 14 prepared for an emergency like respiratory arrest of 7year old from a severe upper resp infection ?

The bio father should weigh in on this with is ex and at least discover why is 7 year old so sick so often ..and that both kids are frequently missing school. I bet the school system would have something to say. 


Rags's picture

If BM is forcing the  truancy of the 14yo to use him as her mini-husband baby sitting parental stand in for the little one DH needs to climb the schools ass and go sit in the truancy office until they spank BM in court.