You are here

New Years Resoltions

sbm014's picture

Every year I feel like most resolutions are about weight and such which sometimes feel unattainable. However being a step-parent I have always tried to also create a step resolution.

For me it is to not start over but to nice forward with my relationship with SS and ignore the negativity for BM and SIL.

I have not had to personally deal with BM since October per he decisions and DH has been understanding of this and only told me necessary stuff. I am excited to start a new year without communication and drama keep it that way and to continue my journey to not let some of he crazy antics she imposes on DH to be my problem. He is the one who chose to be connected to her not me I have our household to worry about it and our happiness as a family only when he is home.

SIL I hope keeps me blocked on Facebook and I will continue to do anything necessary for the nephew but only if DH or MIL need help, no more driving to wait for her to get her son when she claims we do nothing to help her. I will focus less on helping her since she is not appreciative and offer more hand-me-downs and such to my brother for my blood nephew. You don't want to appreciate my help and want to call me "evil hearted" I will not be bothered with you.

As for SS 2013 was a roller coaster we started out awesome and hit a bump as he got needy and started to be very manipulative once BM started dating. When it is just him and I he is the sweetest kid but has been known to lie about me to get attention. The latest was brought up by SIL but DH said nothing to about it so I will ignore. I will be more cautious of how I handle things as he has shown scary signs of manipulation and throwing me under the bus for attention to mainly BM but even sometimes DH. I know he is young and still has some innocence and can truly be a sweet kid and this is who I want to focus on. If he does throw me under the bus I will try better to not attack him but realize most of it happens when we first get him or when he is with BM who feeds into it as she misses "her husband" heck she even still wears some of DH's old clothes. And honestly everything started with BM's changes to a new guy and then her fixation again with telling SS I stole her husband and his daddy.

I have other resolutions for self improvement mainly just dealing wit stress better.

What are your step resolutions?

abugandabean's picture

Aside from the usual, better eating, type of resolution I am making a personal resolution to NOT let BM effect me as much as she does. I am trying to leave the things she did to me in 2013 in 2013 and move on from it. I refuse to let the toxicity that she brought me follow me into 2014. I also is striving to be a better biomom. My kids are my life and so amazing and they deserve the best and there are things that I can do to be a little better all the time.

Happy New Year steptalk!!

SanAntonioSoccerMom's picture

I resolve to go to bed earlier and drink a margarita at least once a week. Smile

hereiam's picture

I'm going to try to stop being so negative about SD. Even though she's not very smart and makes really dumb choices, it's not my problem so I will try to keep my mouth shut. At least until it does become my problem.

DH talked to her today and I was very proud of myself. I didn't ask a lot of questions about the conversation (which I'm sure would have resulted in plenty of reasons to call her stupid) and I said nothing negative.

One day down. This is going to be hard.