It's just hair-or is it a control issue?
Bm took the kids for hair cuts this weekend. According to them, they were in the salon for over 6 hours. Skid 2 just got a trim. Skid 1 got 10inches cut off.
DH is pissed. He's not so upset about the hair but the way the situation went down. Bm owe him money, and told him he'd have to wait until next payday. This money is for medical bills and Co restitution. It's due by the first of the month. She's constantly claiming poor, but always seems tohhave the $$$$ to spend when she wants. The kids had haircuts a month ago; it wasn't needed.
Then there's the issue of communication. She was in contact with Dh about 8 times this weekend before the cut, but never mentioned it. Gripped about other things, and only told him after, telling him not to be mad at skid 1, it was her choice (kid is 10, and has a haircut just like bm's-she's 40 something and it doesn't look good on either of them)
Dh won't say anything-doesn't want bm to know it aggravated him and nothing to skid 1 as he doesn't want to hurt her feelings. There's more to the story, but I'm cautious about what details I post. It just gets old having to keep your mouth shut, and play nice when I'd rather tell it like it is!
BM is the one who took her
BM is the one who took her for the haircut.
The kid is 10. Why would her dad laugh at her about something she can't change? :?
Exactly
Exactly
Yeah .. seems pretty harsh.
Yeah .. seems pretty harsh. It's a haircut .. no reason to give the kid self-image issues over BM's power play.
Without additional details,
Without additional details, I'm going to lean to the "it's just hair" side.
There's no point in him saying anything to BM or skid, as the hair is gone & nobody can bring it back.
Personally, DH & I share your DH's thought in that when BM does something that pisses us off, we don't say a word to her (or the kids) about it.
She does what she does in an effort to piss him off, so letting her know she's succeeding will only reassure her that whatever she's doing is working & encourage more.
It's just hair, & it isn't his. I understand it's irritating, but I think it's something to accept & let go of.
To be honest, as I went back
To be honest, as I went back and read my post, I realized that there's far more than I posted. All responsibility this weekend was dumped on DH and I--picking up and dropping off (she said she didn't have any gas), but then went shopping(but not for school supplies they needed or clothes that fit--they have very little with her that does), spent hours in the salon, and friends houses--yet none of the responsibilities were handled.
I think this is what is getting to me. I had to feed them and pick up project supplies because she wouldn't--not that she couldn't, but she just didn't. Why is more expected of me (by the kids and BM) than by BM herself?
I really hope you do not take
I really hope you do not take foxie serious.
I tend to agree with storm on this to a point. I agree about not saying anything about the hair. But if I were DH, I would say something about her not paying her part of medical, but going and getting hair cuts.
What willow has saiid is the
What willow has saiid is the right way to handle it.
Dtzy, you are correct. More
Dtzy, you are correct. More time was spent on BM's hair than the skids. It's frustrating.
I posted this just a minute ago, and I think it's all of the components together.
To be honest, as I went back and read my post, I realized that there's far more than I posted. All responsibility this weekend was dumped on DH and I--picking up and dropping off (she said she didn't have any gas), but then went shopping(but not for school supplies they needed or clothes that fit--they have very little with her that does), spent hours in the salon, and friends houses--yet none of the responsibilities were handled.
I think this is what is getting to me. I had to feed them and pick up project supplies because she wouldn't--not that she couldn't, but she just didn't. Why is more expected of me (by the kids and BM) than by BM herself? I guess this is where I see it being a control issue.