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Interesting Step Discussion

ndc's picture

So I was at my mom's house yesterday, and her divorced friend was there.  Friend is in her 60s and has two grown daughters and an SO she's been seeing for over a year (but doesn't live with).  Friend was complaining that her SO has made comments recently that her daughters aren't successful enough, while he thinks his own adult children are perfect.  I asked if he could be concerned that her kids take advantage of her, or she's supporting them too much.  She said no, of course not (which I believed because I know she never babysits or does much of anything for her daughter who lives around here). 

A while later, in the course of discussing something else, I learn that Friend's other daughter, who is married and lives about 1000 miles away, is planning to move back here next month.  Apparently she only makes $12 an hour (despite a super expensive college education) and her husband doesn't have a job at all, so financially they're not doing well where they are.  And their plan is to live with Friend "for a few months" while they figure out what they want to do.  It sounds like that "figuring out" doesn't include finding jobs here because they want to move to a totally different state.  Oh, and they're also bringing their four large, shedding dogs to Friend's house (Friend is a neat freak and keeps an impeccable home).   I just rolled my eyes.  Gee, I can't imagine why her SO has concerns about her kids.  This woman truly has no clue.  I felt like I was reading StepTalk!

tankh21's picture

LOL...But you are supposed to "support" your kid no matter what even after they are adults aren't you?

shamds's picture

Or lecture you that you have a fatherly duty to financially care for you and maintain a monthly allowance while bio mum gets to play innocent victim with no responsibility for her kids (a la my sd23.5), real champ she is...

denial is so big for some that they refuse to see and acknowledge it

Rags's picture

Boomerang kids fall into a few categories.

1. Return clingers.  They leave, don't like adulting, and move back home.  It takes a precision explosive divice to dislodge them and get them out again.

2.  The ones that say they are going to launch, leave for a day or two a few times a year but never really launch, and are like toilet paper. They circle the parental planet of Uranus and become clingons.

3.   Adults who visit, whose parents visit, and are not a burden to their parents.