I'm done, but he's not...so now I'm confused!
I know, I know I was done the other day, furious over the entire drama with SS, BM, and her worthless BF, and announced I wanted a divorce. I explained to DH that I needed my own life, and he needed his life to deal with HIS son, because I no longer could do it. Well, he's not happy about me wanting this divorce. He swears SS will be leaving by the times he turns 18, which is next October. DH claims SS is going into the army ( side note: I can't imagine this kid in the army, but maybe, we'll just have to see) so, now I'm confused.
Do I wait it out, and trust that SS will be leaving, and bite the bullet just a few months longer? or do I say screw it, I've had enough, and leave to start a new life away from SS, BM, and BF....
I've put up with this shit for so long, in a way it seems silly to walk away now..but then it seems like I should have walked away years ago...I love DH, but now just don't know what to do....any suggestions would be greatly appreciated-
I was considering that, and
I was considering that, and may look into that for the new school year, if I decide to stick around and work things out...
I would stay if that is all
I would stay if that is all the time that is left. But, I would make my DH sign something to that extent. A post nup that says SS is leaving when he graduates HS and if not, you will file for divorce and ask for some alimony. May motivate DH to get him out of the house.
Good idea, but I don't need
Good idea, but I don't need his alimony, I'm a marketing exec..I support this household and can do quite nicely without him...and he knows it
Good idea, but I don't need
Good idea, but I don't need his alimony, I'm a marketing exec..I support this household and can do quite nicely without him...and he knows it
to be honest, not sure if I
to be honest, not sure if I can...I'm taking it day by day that's all I can do. He is supposed to be at his mothers as we speak, instead, he's asleep here, after being up 1/2 the night..he is a up all night, sleep all day type of person, which, again, is a complete contrast to me, and my lifestyle..we just don't mesh well, we are polar opposites, on top of the other problems. Who knows, he could be a good kid, ( I doubt it) but we are not compatible. Not sure if I'm going to be able to bite the bullet for 10 months..unless SS from hell meets me 1/2 way, which he's never had to do before, so why should he start now.
Also, he has a lot of defenders, because he acts so innocent, he is more of a behind the scenes ass hole. He'll appear to be sweet, and a lover, not a fighter type, but all the while, he's orchestrating drama behind people's backs, making other's look like the bully, when the entire time it's been him..that is hard to deal with, especially when nobody can see through him, and they think I'm picking on him, which is exactly what he wants people to think! he is a master manipulator, extremely cunning, and somewhat narcissistic. He really scares me sometimes, so the next 10 months will prove to be a challenge, IF I decide to stay, which I'm still on the fence about the entire situation...
And I am dead serious about the divorce...I WILL NOT live with this kid beyond 10/2011 that's final & I really do not care who likes it anymore, I have no choice but to walk away if this kid lingers past his birthday...no doubt about it.
Is he out of school? My SD
Is he out of school? My SD turns 18 in March....graduates in the spring. Neither can come fast enough for me. She just ran away the other day...only to return....nothing ever changes for me. Unless its me. If he is not in school, what is so important about his being 18? Here they can leave at 16 if they want. I feel for you. No words of wisdom however. I was stupid and stayed WAY too long.
Yes, he's still in school,
Yes, he's still in school, he's a junior - according to DH, he can graduate as early as next June, but according to his grades, I don't see how that's possible. The importance about him turning 18 is this..if he goes to his mothers now, she'll race to child support court, which I forbid my husband to pay her 1 dime..she has never supported this kid, but threatens child support every time she even thinks he may come stay with her. When he's 18 in my state, he is considered an adult and therefore DH is not obligated to pay support to that low life bitch. Also, I told DH that once he's 18 he's a grown man and DH needs to start letting go to allow this kid to create a life for himself. DH and SS relationship is extremely needy, and unhealthy. I think that distance will do them both good, so wanting him out is not entirely a selfish thing, I think it's best for all concerned.