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I Really Need To SCREAM!

ToddlerMealsTimes2's picture

:jawdrop:

This is my first post, but I've lurked for a long time. DH has custody of DSD who is 12. BM lives semi long distance (1 1/2 hours). Tonight she picked DSD up to take her shopping and when she came home DSD starting putting food in the freezer that BM had sent with her to eat here. SERIOUSLY!

I was a little put off, so I talked to DSD about it. I asked (nicely) if she had told BM there was no breakfast food here she liked to eat, etc. She stated that she told BM she had cereal, oatmeal and such to eat, but she usually didn't eat breakfast.

So BM sent food to our home. I am furious. The woman who doesn't even own a STOVE in her house sent food to the house of a woman who cooks 3 meals a day for 6 people.

Furious!

anabihibik's picture

As presumptious as it is, I'd look at as free food and laugh. If she wants to just hand you her money, that's on her. I don't blame you for feeling offended. I would have, too.

ToddlerMealsTimes2's picture

I guess I could look at it that way. Since she doesn't pay CS, she at least provides food. LOL

ToddlerMealsTimes2's picture

*But, its easy to buy food isnt it? so much easier than actually cooking them something and so much quicker. Thats probably what its all about.*

THIS made my morning. Thank you! Smile I wonder if I can get her to buy a new washer and dryer since she doesn't actually wash all those clothes she goes out and buys? LOL

pat's picture

We don't even want my ex coming near our property period. Pick up and drop off is at a convience store. Sad, but, I don't need her imput on anything.She is evil and always looking to start trouble.

ToddlerMealsTimes2's picture

I completely understand. My poor DS used to have to be exchanged outside the local police station. HE didn't really know where he was, but my ex was abusive so I needed that perceived threat to him if he got out of line.

My DH's ex isn't evil (anymore). She's just clueless sometimes.

CaliStepMomma's picture

Yeah. I hate that kind of crap.

Do you have a dog? Because those damn things are always getting into stuff and eating it all up. Or perhaps a large hamster?

Seriously, though, cook it all at once. Get up early one morning, make everything, even if it's way too much to eat, then throw out the left overs or send them with SD to school for lunch. Tell SD that if there is something she prefers, you will try to make an accommodation but from now on you are not accepting food from BM. If she asks why tell her that it is weird, explain to her about taking charity from people makes you feel like you can't provide stuff for yourself and that you and DH like to take care of her. We've had to do this with my skids from everything from food and dr's visits (BM wanting to take kids during our time) to school supplies and clothes.

ToddlerMealsTimes2's picture

I clean our freezer out once a month, usually I have very little to purge because I only buy what's on the menu to make.

So in two weeks the foods that BM sent will get thrown out in the freezer sweep. I'm thinking about sending the food with DSD back to BM's. Maybe then BM will get the picture?

Synaesthete's picture

I would probably be pissed too (although, it would be more of a direct insult in our situation as I have cooked in kitchens for years and attended culinary school - I know how to make a meal!) but at the end of the day, this is something that I think I would ultimately decide to roll my eyes at and joke with DH about it later, out of earshot of the kids. Like others have said, if she wants to send her money to you in the form of food, that's her issue. Blum 3

I'm a big believer in picking my battles and, honestly, something like this just wouldn't be a hill I'd want to die on. *shrug* It's definitely offensive, but not worth my energy to even acknowledge that kind of obnoxiousness from BM.