I am not sure why this makes me mad
A few days after Christmas SD12 mentioned something about the gift that my fiancé’s mom bought her mother. I am not really sure why finding out my FMIL bought the BM a gift for Christmas made me upset but finding out did leave me disgruntled. It has remained on the top of a list of things I am pissed about that seem to remain unresolved. My family isn’t out buying my ex-husband gifts--- I never said anything to FDH but inside I am still pissed. I obviously cannot control the actions or relationships of others but the constant reminders of his past are really starting to super suck. I almost wish that I could have my ex husband over EOWE to pick up something random he might have left behind so my fiancé could get a good taste of how I feel. I know it is childish and stupid to be mad about something so little but it really chaps my ass. I know I need to let it go but here it is two months later and I am here still trying to figure out why it pisses me off.
I don't think it's stupid and
I don't think it's stupid and childish of you. I really resent the constant reminders of my DH's past all because he "accidentally" got someone pregnant. When I first met DH's dad (my future FIL), his dad had a huge portrait (and I mean it covered the entire wall) of DH, BM, & SD. I thought that was so insensitive to have that displayed for the future and UNFORTUNATE wife of DH!
I'm with you...constant reminders of DH's past are horrible...especially when I didn't bring any such baggage to our relationship!
My husbands mother and sister
My husbands mother and sister bought the kids BM a gift when we first started dating. It's not a big deal because my ex mother n law bought me a gift that first year I was divorced from the ex h. Now that my New husband(2 years married now-4 yrs total) and I are married, it would be a big deal and I would get my husband to put them in their place or we would remove our self from theirs. It was rude that your future SD12 would throw that up in your face and would be a red flag to run. My Mother And Father n law that are divorced in new relationships both do not have the Bm picture up in their house, they cant stand the bitch for what she done to their son. Now I have told my mother over and over to remove my ex boyfriends and husband picture with me in it from her house that it is a total disrespect to my new husband. She refuses so I refuse to have anything to do with her. My husbands feelings are the same as mine. If he is uncomfortable then I am because we are an item, a one, not a two.
I did take it as a dig from
I did take it as a dig from her, almost as if it was her way to let me know about the gift. I tried to keep my face in check (I should be a paid actress at this point) but boy inside my head I had already throat punched her a few times. Of course I thought of 42 clever things to say afterwards but by then too much time had passed and I was left there feeling defeated. It is my understanding that the in laws keep a good relationship with BM because after all "she is the mother of his children." So that fact never changes even after we are married so what is the difference between a gift now and a gift after we are married? I want to move pass this so I want to make sure I understand the difference. It really makes me want to whip out some of my old wedding photos and put them out so they can all deal with a little of my past on their next visit= childish and passive aggressive.