My exH and I each had our own checking and then we had a joint checking that we both deposited into to pay the household bills from. Now I will say I thot it a bit unfair that I had to split 50/50 with him even tho he made more than me significantly. But He always griped that he had to put major expenses on his credit cards (we kept separate cc's too).
So I just sucked it up that since he was paying those cards with new appliances or lawn items or sometime he would just buy stuff to buy it which ticked me off. Anyway, I would definitely do it again that way, but with a few modifications

We have joint checking & savings, however the savings is only used for DH to deposit into each week for our monthly rent that he is responsible for covering. I deposit into our checking & I carry the checkbook. I only deposit what we need to cover household bills that I am responsible for covering (electric, phone, & insurance). Groceries are purchase with cash, along with gas & DH's cigs (he covers those on his own). If he doesn't get enough hours to cover rent & child support, I throw in whatever extra he needs. If I fall short on the household bills, he pitches in to help me. Doing it this way, we're not dipping into money that the other is setting aside for upcoming bills. At this point, whatever we want to save is in cash form in our home. Of course, we could each open our own savings accounts. I'm not big on banks, so I choose to keep mine on hand.

If you don't feel like you want a joint account, there's nothing wrong with having them separate.

My wife and I opened joint accounts when we married and have had no others with the exception of a receiving account for CS.

The CS account is in my wife's name only. When the money comes in it is immediately transferred out. That way if the state screws up they can not take money out of our accounts and screw up our cash flow.

Certainly with modern internet based banking, instant money transfers, etc... joint accounts are not neccessary.

I guess I am old fashioned in my phylosophy on this issue. If the intent of a marriage is for two people to make a life together, maintaining separate accounts, residences, vacations, etc... represents an increased risk to me. Over the years we have taken brief vacations with out the other. This I think is healthy because it gives us a break from each other occassionally. I particularly like it since ..... it gets me out of having to visit my ILs more than I would like. }:) My wife can spend time with her family without my having to suffer through redneck drama hell too often.

My wife and I enjoy spending our time together and building our lives and future together. So we keep our money together. Each of our incomes is marital income so it goes in to joint accounts.

IMHO of course.

Best regards,

i prefer a joint acct for bills only. then separate accts for everything else.i really don't want the money i spend on my clothes and haircuts to come out of H's pocket and i don't want the money he spends on SD to come out of my pocket. separate "fun money" accts are a must in my house. he also has another acct that gets a portion of his check to go toward child support and ex-spousal support required by the court.
i would flip my lid if my money went to that every month.

Married. We both work, we both have separate accounts. We each pay bills. Waaay easier. I buy things for SD if I feel the urge, otherwise, he pays for everything for her including CS. (we have her 50%). That way, I don't get too worked up if he spends too much.

When DH and I married, I joined his checking account and he put me on his savings account, too. He is a whiz with finances (I'm not bad, he's just better), and even though he handles all our bills, he keeps me in the loop on it all. I had my own account, but we liked his bank better, so I closed my accounts when we got married. I already had a savings account at his bank (before getting married) and he encouraged me to keep that account for myself--which I did.

Separate checking, separate credit cars, separate savings, joint savings and investments. We each pay designated bills. All of the separates were opened before we met. The joints after we married.

Oh DH is the same way. That is why we have separate everything. We worked it out to where he pays the house note, the house insurance and all his personal stuff…Car insurance, stuff like that. He also buys all groceries.

I pay all household bills and my personal stuff. I also buy the household products, like cleaners TP and such. It works very well for us. Comes out almost 50/50. We make about the same (he gets a little more with CS) and I always have money left over and he is always broke. Lol

When all the kids move out, we will combine all money. I will guard it with my life and DH knows it and is ok with it. It annoys him to be broke at the end of the month and I still have plenty left over. We would fight FOR SURE, if we were combining right now.

DH will not do joint accounts in any way. He says his finances are none of my business and my finances are none of his business. He makes twice what I make and feels it's perfectly fair if he has plenty left over at the end of the month while I live paycheck to paycheck. So we have the opposite problem as you it sounds like. I am in the process of scheduling counseling because if I don't, it's only a matter of time before I'll walk out the door. I believe that money is the number one issue couples fight about.

We have separate accounts. Like your bf, by dh is terrible with money. I have a lot more assets and a lot more income than he does, but not by my own hard work, but by the means of what I got from the divorce from my ex. So, it just seems wrong to be to use the money from my first husband to support my second husband, even though I did do that while he was unemployed for 8 months last year. I own the house we live in free and clear, and I pay all the bills associated with it (taxes, insurance, utilities, etc.) He pays his own bills (his car payment, car insurance, cs, etc.), and he also buys and pays for all the groceries for the family. Because there is only 1.3 of "them" (his daughter is with us only 1/3 of the time), and I have my 4 kids full time, most of the grocery bill is really for "my" side of the family.

We have a joint checking and joint savings accounts. There is not "my money" and "his money"...never has been. It's all "our money".

He says his finances are none of my business and my finances are none of his business
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That is terrible.

I think it depends on how much you trust your spouse with your money, and whether you are on the same page as to how money will be spent on kids, the ones that aren't yours as well as the ones that are.

I'm all for separate accounts with a joint account to put money into to pay the household bills, because DH and I have 2 very different attitudes toward money. He's a spender, I am saver.

And there is no way I'd put up with DH using my savings money to buy cigarettes! LOL... It seems like separate accounts will work for you all, but you're still going to have to help him manage his money.

Good luck!

We have separate checking accounts (and I have a separate savings account and investment account) but joint checking and savings for routine household expenses. We did this because he came into the marriage with huge debt and me with assets. No way was I putting my financial independence and credit rating at risk.

But we pay bills together, and both of us have access to our financial software that shows his/mine/joint accounts (not that he'd actually USE it if I weren't there). So no secrets, and this works for us.

This marriage everything is joint except we both had ccs when we came into the marriage that we pay. DH pays for "extras" that he wants, was responsible for CS (all done thank G).

My previous marriage we had a joint account, I managed the bills, and we had separate accounts for ourselves. My Ex was really bad with money, ran up a bunch of cc bills behind my back. So I secretly stashed money where he couldn't get it. Sucks not to trust your spouse.

We used to have separate accounts, one joint account, separate savings and accounts for the kids! It just got to be too much so now we have one joint account and one savings and we don't need to use the boys accounts, it's just there for their Christmas money and deposits we make into them.

To make the joint account work, we have to communicate like crazy. I have a horrible memory (especially for numbers) and so I write down everything I spend or get a receipt and give it to H so he can balance the checkbook online and know that we aren't overdrawing ourselves!

It's still a little weird to share financial stuff and bills, but our communication has gotten better and better, although we still need to work on it. So, I would definitely recommend a joint account, just because it simplifies things. As long as you communicate how much you are spending with your spouse it should work out fine. I have friends who love to do all the bills stuff/money and taxes, but I am not one of them! One of my best friends does exactly what my H does and I am like her husband and am happy to let H keep track of things. I know friends that do bills and things together too. It just depends on your spouse/partner and how you want to work things out as far as who does what? It can be tense and awkward, but things get better over time!

Well........I find my husband handsome, sexy, kind, generous..but I do not find him someone that can budget! }:)

If I didn't remind him of paying the house payment, we'd be on the street! He's someone that is so ready to do for others in his family he'd spend all his money on us before he'd pay a bill.

I've told him while that is honorable and nice, it won't hold water for long..lol...I'm very responsible on bill paying and I just cannot stand to see bills not get paid.

So...we have separate accounts and I intend on keeping it that way. Plus his daughter has the "Daddyyyyyyyyy...." syndrome...and I'll be damned while he foots the bill for his 19yo daughter, who for all I know is handing it off to her crackwhore mother. She's been known to do this in the past and I'm not working my ass off to have it get handed to his ex wife. No way in hell!

So yes...separate accounts. }:)