BM possibly lying about father 'dying'??
BM called DH right as school was getting out today (Halloween) and says 'my dad is in the hospital, he's dying, I'm coming to pick my daughter up right now and she might not go to school tomorrow depending on what happens.' (It's always MY daughter, not OUR daughter, she doesn't even refers to her by name - always MY daughter) No problem, but she's at a friend's house getting ready to go trick-or-treating so give me a half hour or so to get her ready.
Long story short, she shows up, in a perfectly chipper mood, and says '(Auntie M) might be taking the kids trick-or-treating tonight so if you want to bring your costume along that's ok!' Uhhhh....your dad is DYING, you have to pick SD8 up RIGHT NOW so she can say her final goodbye, but your sister might take the kids trick-or treating tonight? She doesn't want to be with her dad when he passes? Sounds pretty darn fishy to me. Add to that the fact that my dad passed away a couple months ago and BM threw an absolute fit that SD missed one day of school for the funeral, she showed up here with her hair and make-up all done (when my dad went to the hospital I was lucky I remembered to put shoes on before I went to be with him), no red eyes from crying, not upset, nothing - just 'oh you might go trick-or-treating later yay!'
We did call the hospital to check, and he is a patient there, but for all we know he sprained an ankle or something. Anyone else think maybe she's full of crap, just a little? Maybe her dad isn't 'dying', and BM just wanted to take her kid trick-or-treating? It's not like we never let her have extra time with her daughter, she could have just asked...although with some of the crap she's pulled in the past, I don't doubt for a second that she'd lie about something like this. I really hope I'm wrong.
Unless the BM pulls this kind
Unless the BM pulls this kind of stuff (turns out to be false stories to get what she wants), I wouldn't judge the incident based on hair, make-up and an aunt taking kids trick-or-treating. It would not be unheard of that one family member tries to make kids event (like Halloween) normal for the children while others do the hospital thing. People handle things like this in different ways and I don't think there's any one way that I'd consider right or wrong. Intensive care units are not exactly kid friendly and depending on condition of patient may not even be allowed in. I was very selective last year when my mother was doing so poorly as to when I allowed the g-grandkids and for how long. My husband and my sister's husband got kid-duty back at the house.
Who knows why Gpa is in hospital. He may have had chest pains and is in for observation and stress test. He may have had a stroke or heck, he may have twisted his ankle. As long as DH readily agreed and didn't question , it's kinda late now to say 'no' or get upset over it. If Dh normally is agreeable to changes without squawking this would be a pretty big unnecessary thing to make up. If it turns out to be a lie, well, DH won't fall for it a second time.
I really hope you're right
I really hope you're right twoviewpoints - but she has lied in the past, mostly when she still had custody. We had to cut our vacation short because 'school starts Monday' when we found out later school didn't start until Wednesday - we didn't even know what school she was going to (BM wouldn't tell us) so we couldn't verify. She's agreed to switch weekends and then when it came time for DH to get SD for his time, she would say 'I don't have to let you have her, so I'm not going to.' Unfortunately she's done plenty of lying.
I'm glad my BM can't do this
I'm glad my BM can't do this at least not with her dad however she brings up her dad frequently. Sometimes DH will try to say something and say "I know what it is like to be a stepchild" (both him and I are stepchildren and he was a stepdad when married to her) trying to explain why he stands his grounds on certain things when it comes to SS and she will respond "You're right I don't because my parents were together until the day my DAD DIED, I will never know and I will never care I know what is best for my child" she has said this to both DH and I and it just breaks my heart for SS as only time DH brings it up is when he sees the PAS signs, or her simply treating SS different because DH is in SS's life as she gets to do what she wants with her eldest as his dad didn't want anything to do with him.
It rained here too,
It rained here too, trick-or-treating was canceled. To me, it's not a huge deal if she wanted to take her out, but SD already had plans with her little friends, and I hate to see her miss that because her mom lied (if she lied, I still don't know). I think for me, it's just that she really is that kind of person - she would do something like that. When DH got custody, BM and her then boyfriend couldn't pay their rent anymore without the child support so they moved in with his parents. We knew about it right away but BM didn't know we knew - every time SD came back from visitation, she would say 'we were at the apartment' and we knew she was lying. I finally asked her after a couple months 'who told you to say that?' and she burst into tears - 'mommy told me to lie, I know I'm not supposed to but she said I had to!' So, yeah - making your kid lie, in my opinion, isn't too far off from exaggerating a relative's medical condition to get what you want.