BM Credit Report
I'm not sure how to handle this one. My SS17 lives with me and HD, along with BS13 and BD1 (The suprise baby I got when I turned 40!) His father and I have done some major deprogramming over the past year with him due to his BM's head-games. He has finally realized that an education is important, he works full-time and makes good money with benefits, and is such a wonderful big brother to his siblings. I'm so proud of him because at one time, I would have sworn that he would end up in prison. This kid has really blossomed and his new attitude is nothing short of a miracle. He is now looking at buying a motorcycle (yes, this worries me - safety). HD approved only with SS17 agreeing to take a motorcycle driving/safety course. Nevertheless, while SS17 has been pricing cycles, we have discovered that BM has used HIS NAME and SOCIAL SECURITY NUMBER to turn on her utilities, buy things, etc. In doing this, she has ruined his credit. HD and I are both mad as hell, and poor SS17 is dumbfounded. I told DH that BM has probably used SD11's name and SS# also. (SD11 lives with BM). I don't know what to do to fix this. All I know is that I'd love to slap BM upside the head! GRRRR? Any suggestions?
Contact the credit bureaus &
Contact the credit bureaus & see what you can do. I wouldn't just hold her accountable, I'd nail her to the wall. But that's just me. I've seen young people spin out of control because of mom's that treat their kids like that.
Cajun Lady
"Laissez Les Bon Temps Roulez"
It's called FRAUD
Find out from the police, the credit bureaus, and/or an attorney what your legal rights are in this case--it's no different if SS17's personal information was hijacked by a stranger. Too bad it was his own mother.
This is identity theft and outright fraud. SS17 won't be able to get his own place or even college loans until this is cleared up. See what you can do to repair the credit and then file charges against BM.
Get report; dispute; call police
We had this exact problem with our BM. My SD, at age 7, had phone, electricity, and cable bills in her name thanks to BM.
Because SD was only 7, there really wasn't a credit report on her, which was lucky. But at your SS's age there probably is. Get his credit reports - all three of them. Go through the dispute process. You can do all of this online. The companies are Experian, Transunion, and Equifax.
Also, I would call the police and report the identity theft.
Actually, all you have to do is
Obtain copies of the reports, call the fraud department, request that a fraud alert be issued on his credit reports and tell the FRAUD department, and I can't stress that enough, that you would like to press charges on BM for using a minors social security number. Explain that he is too young to have made these request. They will remove the accounts and ask if you want to press charges anyway.
I know this because when I was 19, I found out that my mother had used my information to get a phone, credit cards and other utilities in my name. I did what I suggested to you. The Credit Bureau will direct you to the fraud department before they will take action, so contacting them directly will save you a few steps. I didn't press charges b/c she is my mom, but I made it clear that if she did it again, I would.
~THE EXERCISE THAT REALLY CHANGES YOUR LIFE IS WALKING DOWN THE AISLE~
This is clearly identity theft.
Just because it was committed by a "loved" one, that doesn't make it any less a crime. Report it to the authorities. Yep, that means your local police dept. or maybe state police. See who handles identity theft in your state... the attorney general's office, maybe? Notify the post office, because she probably committed mail fraud if she sent any applications anywhere by mail using his name. Follow the instructions of laughterand tears for notifying creditors and credit bureaus, she's right on the money... same thing happened when BM did this to DH, we had to jump through all these same hoops.
♥ Georgia ♥
"Good men don't just happen. They have to be created by us women." (from ROSEANNE)
Just in case
If you can't get a company to remove anything based on fraud you can remind them that contracts with minors are voidable. A minor can disaffirm a contract even for a reasonable period of time AFTER he or she turns 18.
I realize that he had no knowledge of these contracts but if the companies act as if he did have knowledge the law is still on his side. The law goes so far as to state that a minor's conduct (not paying a bill) is enough to disaffirm a contract.
"He that passeth by, and meddleth with strife belonging not to him, is like one that taketh a dog by the ears" Proverbs 26:17
I know....
some one who did this.....it was an old friend of my ex, he is still in jail...he used both of his kids identites, and their credit will never be the same...it's so hard to undo. BM really did it this time...press charges. I'm sure at some time our BM will try the same....she is always changing her name and stuff.~ " I started out clean, now, I'm jaded"~ Rob Thomas, Matchbox 20
I thank you all so much for
I thank you all so much for your suggestions and comments. I'm really having to deal with a demon BM. Hmmm, HD and I have only been married two years and in that short amount of time BM has:
1. Called CPS on me with complaints of drug abuse and child neglect (on my 40th B-Day). My and DH's baby was one month old at the time! My BS13 was there and questioned as well. It was easily determined by the CPS worker that they were dealing with a bitter, jealous Ex-wife. They even apologized for bothering me and DH. The CPS worker even went as far as to compare me to Mary Poppins. This was later brought up in a court-room (custody battle to get DH's kids) and she claimed she never called CPS. We caught her in a lie as our attorney had gotten the CPS reports. The judge only gave her a verbal warning.
2. Called the police on my DH and said that he was stalking and harrasing her and that she was afraid to leave her home. She stated that he kept driving by her house and asked for a close patrol. She lied again.....you see......WE LIVE 10-1/2 HOURS AWAY! The local police came by our house and let us know what was going on and that a complaint had been filed. (UNBELIEVABLE)!
3. She has tried to get her son (15 at the time) to buy drugs for her. This was brought up in a court room as well. This is when we got custody of SS17.
4. She claimed SS17 on her tax returns, therefore getting the eic for him. We filed a complaint with the IRS, but haven't heard anything as of yet.
5. At Christmas, SS17 went to visit BM. He called HD and me and begged us to come get him. BM had no gas in the house, therefore, no heat and no water. He said he was freezing to death and was hungry because she wouldn't feed him. Yet, she still had the money to go clubbing, buy cigerettes, etc. SD11 still lives with BM, she refuses to live with me and DH because we have rules in our household. Her mother lets her run wild. This is another disaster waiting to happen. And yes, we have already hired an attorney in this matter also.
These are just a few of the things that BM has pulled and the list goes on and on. It makes me upset, angry, and of course very tired! I started out trying to be nice to this woman, but all I ended up with was a knife in my back.