I have been a step parent since 2003. There have been good times and there have been rocky times. My step children are now both married, one has one child already and one on the way. the other just got married a couple of days ago. I do not have to deal with the strifes of helping to raise them any longer but a new issue has developed, step grandparenting.

I have a step daughter who has a two year old I have trouble connecting to. His mother has no control over him what so ever. I know he is in his terrible two's and I am confident that his constant whining and crying will pass. At least I hope!

My wife and I have recently argued about taking the child on vacations with us. I told her I can not handle the constant fits that the grandchild throws and that until he is older that I will not take him with us on vacations. This started a little tiff about me being disengaged from her children/grand children. I will admit I am for the most part disengaged and try to stay out of anything that involves discussions related to them. It is much easier said then done though.

Although I plan on standing firm on that vacation issue it got me thinking. There is definately a differnt kind of relationship between biological parents and their children. One I don't have since I have never had any children of my own. I was married to my wife at the age of 32 and never had any children before I inherited the skids. My wife already had her tubes tied when we got married. Now I am considering talking to my wife about a tubal reversal and trying to have a child so that I can have that biological connection to. I am now 40 and if I want to have a kid of my own I better do it soon. So my question to all of you is: Have any of you been through raising steps then having a biological before and if so are there any ramifications or stubling blocks that you can give me any advice about. Is the biological connection something that really changes things? Because it has been hard to develop that deep connection with the steps. My wife thnks I am crazy anytime I have brought up having a child. Who knows maybe I am.