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How do I answer? Need someone witty

Elizabeth's picture

BD 4 has her preschool graduation tonight. I e-mailed my husband to let him know I plan to get pizza at my parents' house (they watch my kids while I work and are close to the preschool). That way we can eat and go to graduation.

He said, "What should I do about dinner for SD?" That is his first concern. My response is, "Why the hell should I care? I assume that means she's not coming to BD4's graduation." This is the same kid who he lets eat something else if what I make doesn't suit her.

I say, let her come to the graduation and get pizza or let her stay home and fix something for herself. I need a witty comeback that makes my position perfectly clear!

evilsm's picture

as usual.

~Evil

If you want children to keep their feet on the ground, put some responsibility on their shoulders. ~Abigail Van Buren

bellacita's picture

i dont know, what do princesses usually eat for dinner when what their poor servants (which would be u & the family) are having isnt up to princess standards??? that or, if shes too good to come to graduation, then she can starve for all i care.

Elizabeth's picture

If she's old enough to choose to opt out of BD's graduation, she's old enough to fix herself something for dinner. Not my problem.

sweetthing's picture

one. AT that age she should be able to. Heck My SS's 8 & 10 make toaster waffles all the time & they are pretty helpless. Smile

frustratedinMA's picture

I like the princess comment.. but also like your idea.

Have a great time at bd 4's graduation. Your DH WILL be there.. RIGHT?

Elizabeth's picture

My mom was about to pitch a fit. This has been on the calendar for a month. Then, Sunday, my husband says, "Oh, I think there's a problem. That bike ride I was signed up for was changed from Wednesday to Thursday." In other words, it is on BD4's graduation night. And he was seriously considering going, and missing BD4's graduation! Try explaining that to her some day!

Finally, a couple of days later, he said, "Well, I guess I'm coming to the graduation." And I said, "Good choice. You have chosen wisely, grasshopper." And he got upset. "You mean I had a choice?" I'm like, "You bet you did." And then he's like, "But you wouldn't have liked it if I chose the other one." Of course I wouldn't. Who would?!

Elizabeth's picture

I love that one. My husband would not find it funny.

Harleygal's picture

In your SD's case I'm afraid my reponse would be simply "I don't give a rat's ass!"

Elizabeth's picture

Unfortunately, to preserve family harmony (whatever that is), I can only say it in my head. But it was pretty much my first response!

Basically, she can get something for herself or she can go hungry. I don't care.

bellacita's picture

fearless, every day u continue to crack me up!! i love it!!

Elizabeth's picture

"I'm reasonably certain she can find SOMETHING to eat in the house, considering that she does it all the time if I make something she doesn't like. "

Not particularly witty, but...

Elizabeth's picture

Problem is, SD would jump on getting McDonalds, and husband would be fine with that. But then SD would want a ride there and back (she's too lazy to walk or ride her bike). Then husband would be catering to her every whim and let her drive with her permit, then he would be late for BD4's graduation. It's just not worth opening up that can of worms!

ColorMeGone2's picture

That's what I would've said. Not sure he'd have gotten the Marie Antoinnette reference, though.

♥ Georgia ♥

"Good men don't just happen. They have to be created by us women." (from ROSEANNE)

ColorMeGone2's picture

All good suggestions! I'd have had a hard time not saying, "Who gives a shit?!"

♥ Georgia ♥

"Good men don't just happen. They have to be created by us women." (from ROSEANNE)

Catch22's picture

Has he ever heard the term "Eat Shit" ?

Perfectly fitting in this case I would imagine.

Or more politely: You know what honey, my BD is having her big graduation night and the last thing on my mind at this moment is what your daughter is going to eat. I had to sort out what to feed my daughter, perhaps you could do the same. *Click*

Catch xx
*Mean People Suck*

PinkPixie's picture

I would say in my most sincere, honest voice: "Well I'm sure that sd wouldn't dream of missing her little sister's preschool graduation. I'm sure you didn't mean to insult sd by suggesting she wouldn't want to be with her family tonight, but I think she should plan to eat pizza with the rest of us." Then smile, and walk away.

evilsm's picture

Before I left work yesterday I got a call from an old friend that wanted to stop by to visit from out of town. I didn't expect her until after 7:30 or so. Around 4:30 Dh calls,

Dh: "I thought we would order out for dinner"
Evil: "Sounds great, I would love some pizza"
Dh: "Ok"

15 Minutes later, another call from DH,

Dh: "I'm going to the store to pick up a couple of things, I think I'll just get fried chicken since you have company coming"
Evil: "What happened to pizza?"
Dh: "I don't want company in the middle of dinner and I have to feed SD"
Evil: "Company is not coming until much later, I am leaving in 15 minutes, order the pizza now"
Dh: "Oh, ok, I was just trying to make it easy"
Evil: "I don't really care for the fried chicken, will the pizza be ok?"
Dh: "Anything you want is fine w/me"

So I get home and pizza is delivered 20 minutes or so later, did SD have any? Nope! See, this is what gets me; SD eats pizza, she likes pizza but she didn't want that last night apparently so we have to get something seperate for her. I just don't understand, this happens probably 5 out of 7 meals at our house.

My mother use to force us to eat liver at least once a month, what do you think would happen in your house if you tried that on your Skids? HA!

~Evil

If you want children to keep their feet on the ground, put some responsibility on their shoulders. ~Abigail Van Buren

evilsm's picture

It's DH. I do not run a restaurant at my house, if someone wants something other than what we have for dinner they will make it themselves. Where SD is concerned however, Dh has laid that groundwork for years with her, I have vehemantly opposed this for some time now but it is difficult to change. Dh gets home before I do and insists that SD is starving and he will make her something or buy her something to "get her out of the way". Most of the time she is eating by the time I get home.

He flip flops so much it's like watching one of those mexican jumping beans sometimes, one day she eats with us, the next day he is ordering chinese. FOR HER AND NOONE ELSE! We have issues with this I know but I am just so tired of fighting a loosing battle.

~Evil

If you want children to keep their feet on the ground, put some responsibility on their shoulders. ~Abigail Van Buren

LVmyBOXERS's picture

I make 1 meal and if itis not good enough, too damn bad. You go without. I am not a short order cook. Call your mommy if it makes you mad...

evilsm's picture

Better than most of the "entertainment" on TV these days. I do love you Cruella!

~Evil

If you want children to keep their feet on the ground, put some responsibility on their shoulders. ~Abigail Van Buren

GoingNuts's picture

I don't understand why kids do that it guess it's a way to get attention.

My SD eats all of the time so I guess I would say "Isn't she on a seafood diet? and then H will say something stupid and then your reply "she sees food and eats it..? Sounds better in person...

kassandrarayne's picture

I've got one of those SD's too! Then she wonders why she's got such a serious case of 'muffin top'. Hmm could it be because you eat anything that's not nailed down?? Funny thing is she's too lazy to cook. So if you have leftovers you want to take to lunch the next day make sure you hide them on the bottom shelf of the fridge way in the back....doesn't find them there...that requires too much effort and that's like work!!

Elizabeth's picture

Mine won't eat leftovers, but I do have to hide food in the fridge/freezer in order to have it long enough to cook it. I buy shredded cheddar to make tacos and she eats the whole package in a day (not kidding). I buy pizza rolls for BDs to have for weekend lunch and they never make two days. BDs NEVER get any. I buy frozen pizza and it's gone the next day. But the grapes, apples, bananas, strawberries, and all vegetables go untouched!

B's picture

Pizza rolls used to disappear in my home too. I'd by them for my kids and exH would eat them. I started removing them from their packaging and putting them in an empty frozen broccoli bag! He never 'found' them again, LOL, but every now and then would ask how long the broccoli had been in the freezer - I'd just say 'don't worry about it, it's frozen...'

Elizabeth's picture

to hear that husband bought SD her own pizza for dinner that night. I come home and there's a pizza box in the recycle bin and a bunch of cheese pizza in the fridge. Poor thing might have starved! Except for the leftover baked chicken and rice with pork that she could have eaten...

Elizabeth's picture

I wished we had the video camera. She got to stand up with a pointer and point to pages on the wall that represented the different seasons of the year. And she got to be in a band with some of the other kids. And she walked across the stage in a cap and gown and got a diploma. She gets to keep the tassel! She's going to miss the other kids, so we got a couple of phone numbers for her to call, and she got invited to one girl's birthday party in a couple of weeks. Next stop, kindergarten! (Sob)

bellacita's picture

very cute! glad it was such a wonderful experience Smile

frustratedinMA's picture

That is fantastic!!! Glad to hear that her graduation went well. I am sure it was less stressful and more enjoyable for everyone involved that your sd was NOT present

Elizabeth's picture

I am about to post a blog on a related subject (SD's absence at ALL of our two BDs birthdays). Stay tuned.

J's picture

I would love for you to go get family pictures and deliberately exclude your SD. Then when your DH asks why, say innocently "Oh, is it okay for her to be part of the family now? I just didn't want to make either of you feel weird by including her in something so special. I mean, it's not like you made her celebrate her SISTERS graduation or birthdays or anything. I just naturally assumed that she wouldn't want to participate in this too." Or, if she does go along with it, dress your BD's in something matching or color coordinating and absolutely adorable that goes with what you and DH are wearing. Like, you and DH wear white or gray, and your BD's wear pink, and have SD wear bright yellow or black, and sitting off to the side.

Just my petty malicious side showing.

StepLightly's picture

But don't you feel like saying, "I was thinking of making her some eggs, since we have all these eggshells lying around...because that what we WALK ON when she's here!"