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diyparenting's picture

Submitted by diyparenting on Tue, 04/30/2013 - 1:24am

I have a SS who I have had a hard time disaplining. When I do I am told I am to hard on him, he is just a kid and so on. My significant other and self get along otherwise our disaggrements about his son. I do have a daughter about the same age. My biggest problem is there have been the same rules and consequences in our home for the past 2 years. I have tried many different ways to deal with his son. My last way was to give him 3 chances then letting his father know what he was doing and how many warnings he's got. SO just gives empty threats for the entire weekend. So is very frustrating for myself. When I hold my daughter to the same rules. If I can't displine him nor can I get his father to how can we fix this problem? I'm at the point where I don't want to do things together because my daughter is missing out on my time and having fun because his son is misbehaving or not listening. I don't want to do this but she should have to miss out. Its not fair.

Comments

MotherTrucker's picture

Submitted by MotherTrucker on Tue, 04/30/2013 - 7:19am

I agree with tog. His father needs to be the one to do the discipline. If he is not home, then yes, you should try and correct the behavior, but otherwise it is on the father.

Tuff Noogies's picture

Submitted by Tuff Noogies on Tue, 04/30/2013 - 7:28am

"empty threats for the entire weekend" - yup, i know the feeling. he'll do nothing but bitch and gripe and threaten to threaten 'em more... not much u can do about this one, diy, except agree that you parent your child and let him parent his. and dont let your daughter miss out on stuff cuz your SO is being an asshat!

SisterNeko's picture

Submitted by SisterNeko on Tue, 04/30/2013 - 8:16am

When I started dating DH, ss5 (who was 3 at the time) was a horrible child. I wasn't working so I was basically the baby sitter for awhile. I asked DH what I was and wasn't allowed to do when he wasn't there since discipline needs to happen as soon as the child misbehaves at that age. We agreed to time outs.

So when he would scream and hit me I would yell and scream at him (like he was to me) all the way to his room where I would throw a massive fit (just like him) and then walk out. Yeah he doesn't scream and hit any more.

At the store once he threw a fit and started kicking me so I let go of the cart and walked away, I left him screaming in the middle of the isle until he stopped then I went back and got him, we finished our shopping another time he threw a fit and we just left. To this day I am the only one that can take him shopping without him throwing a fit.

I would give your SS a taste of hism own medicine. If he is going to act like a brat then you can to and just not take him with you or do what he asked.

SisterNeko's picture

Submitted by SisterNeko on Tue, 04/30/2013 - 8:17am

Oh and when I say "yell and Scream" it's more of and stern "Go to your room" with a "NOW" if he isn't moving fast enough.

Jsmom's picture

Submitted by Jsmom on Tue, 04/30/2013 - 9:58am

You need to not be disciplining him...It is not your place, it is his fathers. If you do, you will always be the bad guy. Causes too many problems. I don't let DH discipline my child and I don't do his.