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Cover1W's picture

Submitted by Cover1W on Sun, 05/11/2025 - 2:59pm

Dear ST, my beloved husband passed away last night after a tragic bicycle accident (no vehicles involved) on Monday. I cannot begin to describe how I feel.  I will tell you that this site gave me the tools to be with him, to handle his SDs, and to vent freely and get really good feedback. It was invaluable because it gave us 12 years together, not nearly enough.

SD19 and BM were able to say goodby to him on Wednesday. It was a very good thing and BM was nothing but gracious, helpful and supportive of me. SD19 is devestated.

SD21, estranged, has been in England at a semester abroad. She was called by BM at the hospital and spoke with DH's sister and her sister (note she did not talk with me even though I was in the family room with them). She was VERY upset and now is regretting not speaking or reconciling with him. She didn't want to speak with him at first, but called back 15 minutes later, insisting on speaking with him. (he was unconscious but I think he could "hear" things). She ended up flying back here yesterday to be with her mom and sister. She was not able to see him.

His sister, my "sister" too, was luckily in CA, on a trip before she returned to England. She immediately flew here and she and I were able to take care of him, talk with doctors, and say goodbye. We spent three days together. After some things are settled, I plan on going to her and her family for a while.

I am priveliged to know that we loved each other absolutely, that we were meant for each other. I've lost my best friend, confidant, support, and for his flaws, and mine - through all of those.

I'll be in contact with his youngest through some of this as his estate is settled. He had a will and I don't expect any issues (I will fight with fire if anything happens).

Much love to all of you STers. I won't delete my account, for others to read if needed, but I likely won't be back after the next week or so.  May you all be at peace with yourselves, and take care of YOU.

Comments

CajunMom's picture

Submitted by CajunMom on Sun, 05/11/2025 - 4:00pm

I am so sorry to hear this. I will lift you in prayer, Cover. May you be comforted during this time. Much love to you!

notsurehowtodeal's picture

Submitted by notsurehowtodeal on Sun, 05/11/2025 - 6:08pm

Cover, I am so sorry! Your previous blog was so uplifting and hopeful. You and DH had worked through so much and were definitely one of the success stories. I can see why you might not be back, but please know we are always here for you, no matter what happens.

Dollbabies's picture

Submitted by Dollbabies on Mon, 05/12/2025 - 12:01am

so very, very sorry for your loss. This must have been doubly hard because there was no warning, so no time to prepare. 

Winterglow's picture

Submitted by Winterglow on Mon, 05/12/2025 - 4:20am

Please accept my heartfelt condolences. Words are never enough ... but know that you are in my thoughts.

(((HUGS)))

ESMOD's picture

Submitted by ESMOD on Mon, 05/12/2025 - 7:06am

I'm so sorry for your loss... feel free to stick around and share wisdom.. if it helps you in any way.

notarelative's picture

Submitted by notarelative on Mon, 05/12/2025 - 7:27am

I am so sorry. May the memories of good times buoy you through the valleys of grief.

Aniki-Moderator's picture

Submitted by Aniki-Moderator on Mon, 05/12/2025 - 8:19am

Cover, I'm sending love and strength your way with all I've got. My ddeepest sympathy for your loss, dear lady. {{{{{HUGS}}}}}

Harry's picture

Submitted by Harry on Mon, 05/12/2025 - 9:12am

Do yourself a favor and get a lawer.  Don't give away your late  husband things , take some time before you give his things to SK.   They most likely never speak to you again 

Elea's picture

Submitted by Elea on Mon, 05/12/2025 - 9:14am

I am so sorry for your loss. What a shock. I haven't been on ST in several months because all has been relatively quite with SD's still traveling out of the states. You have been encouraging to me and I am glad to have connected with you on ST. I hope you do check in with us sometime. I am quite a bit younger than DH so I am very curious to know how things will go.  We do have legal arrangements made and I also would fight with fire if necessary but I hope it's never needed.

ImperfectlyPerfect's picture

Submitted by ImperfectlyPerfect on Mon, 05/12/2025 - 9:27am

<3 Thinking of you - we are here if you ever do come back to join us. Thank you for your contribution to our community. 

TheAccidentalSM's picture

Submitted by TheAccidentalSM on Mon, 05/12/2025 - 12:56pm

Your love was evident in your blogs.  I'm sorry for your loss and you will be in my thoughts and heart.