I HATE MY SD
I am 21 years old and i have been with my FH for a year. He has 2 child D3 S 10months. My SD the 3 year old is the spawn of Satan }:) . Never in my life have i hated, despised, nor disliked such a child, just hearing her voice irritates me. I had an AD that was two weeks older than her and she never gave me problem. She was literally day compared to my SD. My ad had manners, said please and thank you, may i have and sorry. While on the other hand my SD was disrespectful, rude, nasty and just plain BAD. I one instance my AD wanted something my FH and I we sharing I gladly told her that she had to ask and she will recieve. She said may i have some please and got some, my SD came up and continually tapped my FH and said Daddy while also refusing to say please for 45 mins. She's thrown cups at me, given me temper tantrums, refused to listen if her Grandmother or father was around, taken pull ups off and smeared feces in the carpet and on her eating table,,peed on the floor, pooped on the floor, broken things of mine she is just down right sickening :sick: . Now as far as my SS That is almost a year he is the light of my day!!!!!!!! He is just utterly amazing and i have to say its because he has never been around his BM. The BM was put in prison 4 months before giving birth to my SS because she thinks stealing credit cards is fun. Unfortunately because she isn't very bright the influence she has had on my SD has rubbed off and now i feel that my SD is not so bright in the common sense department :? . And because she has had such an impact on my SD i feel she is to far gone to be reeled back in to become a well mannered child YET! I still have time to mold my SS into something great. Now the whole meaning of this is THIS! I want my FH to allow my SD to live with her mother for 1 because she knows her mom and her mom knows her for 2 So i don't have to deal with her ass. Is that wrong to want to just give her up so my life could be easier i mean I hate the BM and I'm at a point where i hate my SD as well. I honestly don't feel i should add stress to my life by dealing with this unapproachable child.
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My DH feels it is just a
My DH feels it is just a phase, that she is only doing these things because her little brother is here. I feel that is not the case i feel that something might really be wrong with her. Thank you for commenting.
It really is sad. I just felt
It really is sad. I just felt so alone before i found this site. I felt horrible that i could have such harsh feelings toward a small child yet i knew this wasn't normal behavior because my AD(rest her soul)never acted like that when she was with me. I also feel that after my AD passed i really started feeling more unexplained dislike toward her because i couldn't understand why my SD could not act more well mannered like my AD.
I'd approach it with FH with
I'd approach it with FH with the view that she will be going to kindergarten/school etc. and ask him what he thinks you both can do to modify her behaviors, at least gain some control over her before then. I am not entirely sure if the girl can control her own self...
I always found that ignoring a tantrum, or outburst, worked.
FH might be right in that she's going through a phase of sorts, although twos are generally not this bad. I am inclined to agree with Katrinkie, it's NOT normal. I think I'd also approach FH with the idea that maybe a different response to her behaviors might work. Do some research together? Then ask him to try it for three months?
I'd approach it with FH with
I'd approach it with FH with the view that she will be going to kindergarten/school etc. and ask him what he thinks you both can do to modify her behaviors, at least gain some control over her before then. I am not entirely sure if the girl can control her own self...
I always found that ignoring a tantrum, or outburst, worked.
FH might be right in that she's going through a phase of sorts, although twos are generally not this bad. I am inclined to agree with Katrinkie, it's NOT normal. I think I'd also approach FH with the idea that maybe a different response to her behaviors might work. Do some research together? Then ask him to try it for three months?
I'll try but it's so hard to
I'll try but it's so hard to say it without him bringing up that I treated my AD like an angel and i treat my SD like *hit. I never intended for it to be like that. So now that we have that double standard in the playing field i can't really explain to him that the things she does is not normal and that she might need some help. he'll automatically think im calling her slow or retarded and bring up my AD being my prize possession.
Can't blame a 3 year old.
Can't blame a 3 year old. Her mother is in jail and dad isn't parenting. Why the heck is she wearing pullups? Some of the things going on are normal. Your FH's lack of parenting isn't.
To be honest i was told that
To be honest i was told that she was potty trained in the beginning of our relationship (A year ago)....Well it took me 6 consecutive months to get her to start getting the hang of using the "pot". As for my AD it took 4 days. In some aspects I feel that she just doesn't want to learn, I don't think she is slow, just something in her that doesn't want to advance.
How long have you been in
How long have you been in this relationship? Think long and hard about the road ahead. You hate this child. What happens if mom dies or isn't able to take her? What if dad says there is no way he'll send her to mom?(I sure wouldn't).
Get this child help
Get this child help now....she is crying out for help. I have a three year old at home and I know when things get stressful for her she acts out because she is looking for LOVE! A child 3 years old is way too young to dislike.....I am so worried for her......10 years old on the other hand is a different story, try some love with her and buy some patience, it's not easy parenting a 3 year old even in good and stable times.
I understand what you are
I understand what you are saying but if you spent a week with her you would feel some kind of dislike toward her. Being the SM my opinion is no good since her dad overlooks that she could have a oroblem. NObody sees that this could be some-what an issue.