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I need HELP with my youngest step daughter!!!!

townsendb's picture

Submitted by townsendb on Mon, 08/15/2011 - 1:28pm

Help!! Okay my youngest step daughter is 6 and she acts like she is 1! Her mom doesn't help her with homework or anything, so this summer my husband and I took it upon ourselves to try to help her with her learning before she goes into first grade. She started out doing great we were able to teach her several words and work with memorization in just a week then she just started giving up and now she has even started saying words like a baby again. Her sister was coloring and so she came to me and asked if she could "cudder" too. I told her as soon as she could say it right since she knows how. "Cudder, cower, cuddle" She kept trying words that just were more baby ways to say it. Now I'm getting scared about it since now in 3 months I'm due with my first biological baby and I'm very excited about it but I don't want her around my newborn son when shes already blaming him for her actions. When we ask her why she acts like a baby, talks like one, or eats like one, she answers cause I had a dream about the baby and I talked to him like a baby now I can't stop. Or I dreamt about the baby and he told me to act like a baby. She's already blaming him for this I'm afraid of what she'll do with him if she gets a minute alone and what story she'll come up with as to why she did it and how he told her to. I need to know what to do please help me!!

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DaizyDuke's picture

Submitted by DaizyDuke on Mon, 08/15/2011 - 1:33pm

Can you have the big sis speech with her? Tell her that it will be very important for her to speak properly when her new brother arrives so that he can understand her and because he will need her to be a good "teacher" ?

If she can use your son as an excuse, so can you!

townsendb's picture

Submitted by townsendb on Mon, 08/15/2011 - 1:40pm

It doesn't work we've been telling her that she can't be around the baby when he is born if she doesn't start behaving like a big girl. We told her she needs to eat properly if she wants to hold him cause food helps her bones grow so she will be strong enough to hold him without him getting hurt and she says she wants to be a big sister but she won't stop being a baby. We asked her older sister and brother to help teach her words and spelling and reading and how to do things like putting on her shoes and they got sick of her not listening to them like she does to my husband and myself. She gives up, doesn't listen, then wines like a baby. Her sister got so annoyed she came to me begging me to let her stop after only a half an hour.

Anywho78's picture

Submitted by Anywho78 on Mon, 08/15/2011 - 1:43pm

I'm with Daizy...if a child uses a new baby for an excuse to be like a baby, they don't get the point of being a "big" sister.

I'm sure that as soon as she gets into school, she'll be back to her 6 year old self...generally speaking, kids don't like big babies in class Smile fingers crossed for you there!

With my SS8 & SD7, they often times fall back on babyish behavior...in return, I take away their "big kid" privileges until they can behave in an age appropriate manner.

Don't put too much thought into how she's going to "blame" your baby for things...once he arrives, her trying to blame him will turn her into a big fat liar...just be sure to catch her while your baby is still unable to hold his head up..."Really SD??? BS is so new he can't even hold his head up...how exactly did he tell you to XXXXXX??? How do we feel about lying??"

Good luck though & congrats on your soon to be addition Smile

Auteur's picture

Submitted by Auteur on Mon, 08/15/2011 - 1:45pm

How does her DAD handle this? Does the BM know you're having a baby? She may be filling SD's head with "when the baby comes, your dad will forget ALLLLLLL about you!!"

Also, if she's being raised on the "instant gratification/pacification" model like the way the Behemoth (BM in my case) raises Venus De Milo(SD stb 13) then you have your answer.

VD (for short) is going into the 7th grade with a 66 grade average (65 is failing in NYS) and can read/write at a 2nd grade level only. Not because she's dumb or because she had a learning disability (that the Behemoth pulled strings to get her bogusly classified as to cover up her piss poor free ranging non-parenting), but b/c she's never been taught delayed gratification.

She cheats at games if she doesn't start winning IMMEDIATELY. If she thinks something is "too hard" she won't even try. She was doing the baby talk crap right up to age 9.