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I'm so happy to find this space, I need to vent!

Stepmonster123's picture

I hate to be the crazy lady that jumps right in with complaining but heaven knows I have kept my mouth shut for so long that I just might pop! My SD will be 18 in just a few days and I feel guilty just typing this. I cannot stand to be around the child. Her bio mother is proud of the accomplishment that "hey at least she's alive" she has done the bare minimum. Too busy trying to find the next baby daddy. My SD was supposed to move in with us but would rather spend her senior year drinking, drugging sleeping around and homeless then acting right. Her father has zero control. I'm sure he feels guilty for leaving her mom. My MIL is even worse with undermining every rule in my house and has been since day one, which has been 10 years now. Over the last 10 years I have had my SD Threaten me with a knife, call me all kinds of names, torture my daughter who is a year younger, push me, scream in my face, I have had to clean her filth (bio hazard type filth!). Tonight was the last straw with showing up here at 930 ( my husband told her she could without even asking if I was ok with it) just to get a stupid storage container. This crap is not even close to all of the stunts she has pulled. Am I a horrible person because I hate my SD and her mother for raising her this way? I also seriously resent the hell out of my husband for bring her bullshit to my family.... ugh! 

Comments

tog redux's picture

If you are a horrible person, you are in good company on this board. Since SD has moved herself out of your home, I hope the locks will be changed at 18? If she's choosing the streets, no need to let her keep going in and out of your house. I assume she has a drug problem, and your DH should get some help for himself so he doesn't enable that and make it worse. 

justmakingthebest's picture

Welcome!!

No, you aren't a horrible person and are totally within your rights to be resentful of your husband for allowing her behavior to be so disrespectful and disruptive in your home!

I don't have much advice other than to make sure that you and he are on the same page when it comes to how things will look for her visitation after she graduates/turns 18. 

TheAccidentalSM's picture

Vent away.

Plus spend sometime reading some of the past stories.  It's shocking to discover this much disfunction. But comforting to know you aren't alone.

JRI's picture

My SD, now 60, was a dysfunctional teen, now a dysfunctional 60 year-old.  She moved in and out of here in her teens several times.  We always fell for "poor SD" stories.  Dont let your SD move back.  It will only teach her that somebody else will always clean up her life.