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ugh.

stepmomsoon's picture

Ok, after a very rough week last week, DH and I patched things up.. even though I was "Done" we got past it.. not that all is forgotten and DH knows this.

We had a weekend without the kids to just sit and really hash things out..

Saturday, we went to look at a kitten that a friend of mine who owns the rescue we got our current cat from recommended for us.. our cat is dying from cancer. Well, it's not exactly "our cat".. my daughter and I had this cat before we got involved with DH and skids.. the cat adores my daughter and me.. and can't stand the skids.

The skids have a dog they brought to the marriage too. He is a needy pain in the ass.

Anyways.. we brought the kitten home and per the instructions from my friend on how to slowly introduce the little fella into our household, we started in baby steps. The kitten has been staying in our master bedroom - food, litter box and all and we have slowly been acclimating him to the rest of the 4 legged family. It should take about 10 days..

Now, bear in mind this kitten was brought into the home as a band aid to help my daughter get over the fact that her cat has cancer and probably will need to be put down by the end of this month..

I have no problems with the skids playing with, loving on or anything with this kitten.. but they need to understand that this is mainly my daughters kitten to help her get over the death of her cat. Is that too much to ask?

Apparently so.. ss14 is already whining about wanting to sleep with the kitten when we haven't even gotten him used to the rest of the house.. ss12 wants to have him play with him.. in his room.

The only person that hasn't demanded anything is my daughter - who the kitten is for!!

The kids each came into our bedroom and play with the kitten - no issues there. And the little guy is comfortable with our current cat and is getting used to my small dog.. next is the big dumb one.

But no.. that's not good enough. The skids are pushing me to just let it out of the room and deal with the dogs or "lock the kitten and the big dog in the laundry room so they can work it out".. are you serious..??

So, now I see resentment setting in.. the skids are pissy about the kitten and the past day and a half don't even ask to see him..

I mean seriously.. can't they ever just think about another person's feelings for one second? DH was like "it's not just your daughters kitten".. I know this.. it's not all her kitten, but when her cat passes it is whatever she needs it to be to help her through that time.. You mean to tell me these kids can't understand and accept this? That hey, maybe they can back off and let the kitten love her up and not be jealous since her cat just DIED?

If their dog died and they got a puppy, I know for a fact my daughter would not be trying to hog the thing.. she would be the way she always is - compassionate and kind. Something apparently the skids are not.

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stepmomsoon's picture

Yea, he will let me and my daughter pick him up and carry him around like a big ol' baby.. the skids - no way! He won't even let them pet him.. lol. Guess he senses the evil in them.

Thanks.. her and the cat are super close - he absolutely adores her! Sleeps with her every night.. and even knows her bedtime - literally he will meow at her at 9pm and try to get her to follow him to her room.. it's so cute!

I talked to her about his cancer and she is taking it well - the kitten helps out by giving her something else to love and bond with, but I know when the time comes she will be crushed to lose her guy Sad

I will too.. I love that silly little booger.. because he makes my daughter so happy and he truly is the best cat we have ever had.

stepmomsoon's picture

Yea, they have zero empathy for the fact that this kitten is here so it can help her (their little step sister) through a tough time.. I mean, seriously, it's always about them!

The big dog is fine with the older cat - actually, the cat picks on the big dog and it is absolutely hilarious.. hopefully he teaches the kitten his skills Smile

stepmomsoon's picture

She is actually doing very well.. when we got the kitten I chatted with her about where he came from.. and that he needed a special home since he was abandoned. I also talked to her about her kitty and how he has cancer and we will do our best to keep him going as long as we can - she cried and was pretty upset, but I told her "we still have him and we need to enjoy every minute we have with him and not think about losing him"... she seemed to understand as best as an 11 year old can.

The kitten and her are bonding.. and the other night we had a blast watching the kitten and our old guy playing and being super silly! I am so happy we got to experience the kitten bringing joy to our special fella Smile