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nicknames for BM

spackle's picture

Some of the nicknames people have on here for their BM crack me up.

I've been trying to think of a good one for mine. She has very pointy features in her face and the rest of her is kind of lumpy and dumpy-looking. She is pear-shaped, and she's gained weight as she gets closer to 40, so it's even more pronounced.

What is your BM nickname, or your favorite on here? I like whomever uses "Kracken" on here.... "kracks" me up. Smile


Somuchdrama's picture

BM is "the troll" because she is short and angry. Her boyfriend is "No-neck" because he resembles a hotdog.

Sootica's picture

BM is GU (Golden Uterus) or C U Next Tuesday Zilla (yes the "C" word so less of a mouthful in real life).Since yours is pointy on top but round on the bottom makes me think of an egg -how about Humpty C U Next Tuesday Ty ( "C" word add the "ty" on end to rhyme with Humpty).Lol I think I need to go wash my mouth out with soap now Wink

MissElphaba's picture

BM for me is the Grand High Seahag. I used to just call her the seahag until I was reintroduced to the movie with Angelica Houston - Witches? Then I elevated her hag-dom to include Grand High. I agree with Dtzy, Ratface Rachel.

Gabriels Mom's picture

I call BM cuntalotapus. Sometimes I call her Grimace. Because she is kind of triangular shaped. I saw her wearing a light purple shirt and it reminded me of that mcdonalds thing.

spackle's picture

LOL. Last time I saw BM she was wearing a skirt and she looked EXACTLY like Grimace! Not purple, but the shape. Hahaha. May have to borrow that if you don't mind!!

Gabriels Mom's picture

No not at all.

Oh yea I also call her platinum white trash...once I said it to her face...oops

MissElphaba's picture

Oh my gosh, you definitely said Cabbage Crotch and now I cannot even stop laughing. Thank you.

StepKat's picture

Psycho, but I'm thinking about calling her the husband huntress or divorce queen.

Living the dream's picture

I call our BM the succubus. A succubus is a creature that sucks the life out of a man by f***ing him.

I can't think of a better way to describe a BM. Depending on the state, the sucking goes on anywhere from 18 to 21 years after intercourse.

spackle's picture


Camelstraw's picture

'Dog-breath', 'Popcorn teeth', 'witchity grub' - all based on fact...

Toastergirl's picture

Dr. Evil

She is a doctor in real life. She is also a pretty evil person, and wants SD to be just like her. When SD acts like her mother, I refer to her in My head as, "mini-me".

Cheyenne's picture

Fat guts because of the obvious "fat gut". She has had 5 kids with 5 different fathers

momandmore's picture

Hot dog is the one she hates the most. It has been her nickname since middle school and I don't think I need to explain why. To top it off.. Her brother would eat the hot dogs out of her vag. :sick:

momandmore's picture

Yup. I actually thought the brother part could have been a rumor.. I guess they bragged about it in school but it was confirmed a few months ago on BMs FIs FB page. FI posted a poor pity me status about BM taking off on him to rendezvous with another guy for a few weeks and the comments were hilarious. One person was defending BM and the rest (including BMs family) were talking and laughing about the hot dog situation.

momandmore's picture

Sorry. Iloathe hotdogs but SDs love them so when BM comes over for a visit and they haven't had lunch yet.. They get hot dogs. Bahaha.. }:)

Yeah and they weren't little kids playing doctor.. They were teenagers :sick:

DH would call her HD to every 30 out of line names she would call him, me or our kids and she was ready to press charges. Lol

another step's picture

Mother Superior. And of course, the three skids - the Holy Trinity. I swear. It was just too easy. Smile }:)

Glassslipper's picture

We call her "windy" because she wrote DH saying me live a lavish lifestyle while she nearly suffered a bankruptcy and it's all our fault she lives in poverty even though we pay our 50/50 and have 50/50 custody. So it started as "the wind beneath our wings" and got shortened to just Windy now...

CBCharlotte's picture

I should also note that BC is in our itunes and netflix passwords...the skids have no idea what it stands for LOL

sasha101's picture

"Beastie of the Moor". DH christened her with the name when he was still with her, and used to call her it to his friends behind her back. She's also known as "stupid", "that" and "her".