It sounds like she is a mini-wife. Does she have friends? Mini-wives are too stunted emotionally to have healthy relationships with others.

The best thing you can do is research and let your hubby know that this isnt healthy behavior for his daughter (so he doesnt feel guilty) and that its in her best interest to create and enforce healthy boundaries (because guilty parenting is not GOOD parenting, and isnt good for the kiddos).

Child-centric parenting isnt sustainable long-term, and will continue making YOUR life hard and not very fulfilling as far as your marriage goes. This has been an on-going issue. Time to draw a hard line for your husband. Time to read and re-read the answers to your last post in January.

Please go through my blog to see what SD will be like at 23.  

Mini-wives are the worst.

Please start the discussion now with DH and align on what the expectations are for SD when she turns 18 and how long she will be allowed to live with you.  Otherwise SD will never leave on her own.

You start talking about going along on her dates, and honeymoon and just in general intruding on HER life plans.  Ask her if she expects to be a part of her dads sex life.  She's 15 and feel free to start countering her expectations with real life situations. As for DH's guilt,  ask him why he left that old marriage and what about it was so special that he keeps bringing it into YOUR marriage with him. Then tell him to knock it off if he wants to keep this marriage intact.    
 

It seems there's an explosion around here of mini spouses and I don't understand why it's so hard to demand adult behaviors in your partner.   Being a COD does not entitle you to special exceptions for just having divorced parents.  The divorce rate in the US means they aren't special, in fact more common.   If you are here,  you probably have a disordered personality in your mix and as such need to act accordingly, not as if all involved are normal.  High doses of facts and real life truths need to be spoken frequently. Like everyday.  It's not normal.  Adults who turn to their kids to fulfill emotional needs is NOT NORMAL.  
 

I need more coffee.  
 

His marriage was ALL about the kids? Goodness, I wonder what caused the demise of his first marriage? Does he imagine that the same won't happen if nothing changes... 

Ask him if he understands the difference between a daughter and a life partner. 

His marriage was ALL about the kids? Goodness, I wonder what caused the demise of his first marriage? Does he imagine that the same won't happen if nothing changes... 

Ask him if he understands the difference between a daughter and a life partner. 

Wow she's 15 and still that clingy? My SD was like that when she was younger but definitely by 15 she was phasing out of it. And now at  16 things have been really enjoyable when she's here. (Well for the most part)

as for things you do with your husband like a trip or dance lessons or actually anything at all when it's done during  timesshe's not with you - why are you even telling her? My DH tells SD hardly anything about what we do on the days she's not here. And she never knows when we go away. In all the trips we've taken over the years which of been a ton (I would say over 60 in six years)she knows probably about four ( keep in mind these aren't all amazing exotic trips some are just a one or two night getaways somewhere close by. But still we do go away a lot). Someday she may find out about everything and realize how much DH has lied  to her but that's not for me to worry about. And he doesn't really lie he just doesn't go into detail. So when he says something generic like "oh we just got back from having a quick bite or we're just sitting down in front of the TV." It's all true stuff it just happens to be that we ate out at a restaurant on vacation and we just got back to the hotel room and had the TV on

He needs to man up and be her dad as well as your husband.  She's acting like a jealous ex or something, not a daughter.  I wouldn't have dared to say anything about my dad and step mom going away without me.  Dad would've shut me down and hard.  He understood that he was the parent and I was the child.   Had I said something as an adult he probably would've just laughed at me.   Dad wasn't afraid to set boundaries whether it was with us kids, or my grandmother, aunts, uncles, etc.  Early in my parents' marriage my mother had to put her foot down about certain things, so Dad learned to set boundaries and put his marriage first.  No doubt he carried that into his second marriage as well.  Mom was never a HCBM so there were never any issues from the ex-wife.  She would've backed him up as far as dealing with us so none of us dared to cause problems between Dad and step mom. 

That's the problem with some of these husbands.  They don't grow up all the way. They're so scared to set boundaries with their mothers, sisters, friends, etc.  Then later on they find themselves in a new marriage and won't stand up to their kids and ex.  This has to stop. 

Does your DH want to be guilty or does he want to be married? I don't think these men truly grasp how unappealing they are to the world at large.

These mini bitches are a pain. These guilty dads are so unappealing. He better not ruin it. What 15 yr old needs daddio on her birthday IF she is with her mom? Whether you are away or not makes no difference. I am sure daddio will still call her. Geez

Yea mini bitch we leave on your birthday. Our happy life does not revolve around you.

Gawd I would have loved to say something like that to my ex SD. Taking the high road SUCKS LOL

Every meet up they walked side by side with hubby whilst he pushed our 2 kids in the stroller, i was expected to walk behind them. At family weddings they sat next to him like glue and refused to interact with family members which made them wonder why these people came along.

i refused to compete with 2 feral sd's who lacked basic life skills and wanted ti compete for alpha female status and hubby was firced to tell them that they would show respect around me, that he's had enough of the non stop rants of biomum and stepdad who are not of importance or relevance to him. 
 

they ceased contact after that and are too busy to mert with dad unless they get a financial benefit out of it.

they come from bio mums family who is all about sticking it to people and trying to brag even when there is nothing to brag about. 
 

its been almost 2.5 yrs i have had no contact with my 3 skids and its amazing not being subjected to their toxicity