Wits end!
If a natural parent decides to leave town to start a new life and parents minimally via text and FaceTime along with a quarterly visit. How involved should you make her when serious discipline issues come up. I am mothering her boys in almost every way other than that I am not their natural mother. They still don't seem too open to me being involved in their discipline even though I have been their stepmom for 9 years and they have lived full time with us for 3 years. Am I allowed to discipline? Should I involve the "mother"?
- Sheame's blog
- Log in or register to post comments
Comments
IMHO, u're 'allowed' to
IMHO, u're 'allowed' to discipline children living full time in your home. I wouldnt involve the mother as far as getting any input from her as to how things are handled, but i would have your DH give her the courtesy after the fact and tell her about any serious issues with the skids (as in "SS got suspended from school for having pot, Sheame and I have decided he is grounded at home for 3 months with no electronics.")
although i currently have no desire to be involved in any disciplining, as BM has primary custody, i already have my response prepared for the time if/when my skids might use the "not the momma" line - "No, i may not be your biological mother, but i am the female adult of this household, and as such i have every right to enforce consequences when household rules are broken."
"Nope, I'm not your mom, but
"Nope, I'm not your mom, but I'm the mom in charge right now!" Works on SKids and GirlScouts in my experience.
of course you don't have to
of course you don't have to include her, why would you? curious, what's the situation that's come up?