I have been reading all of your blogs daily for the last several weeks....this is my second blog. I just don't understand how you all manage to stay sane with the skids and the BM's. My BF and I are talking about getting married in July of this year. This would be both of our 2nd marriage. We also both have children, I have a 6 year old daughter from my previous marriage and he has a 5 year old son from a previous relationship (never married) and an 11 month old daughter from his previous marriage. My BF and I have a great relationship and I love him very much and I also knew of his "baggage" before getting involved with him. The 11 month old is easy...smiles, hugs, kisses, food.....and she is happy. My ss is a different story. It is impossible to bond with this child, well at least for me it is. His father doesn't have a bond with him. Actually, the only bond he has with anyone are his ex step mother (the 11 month olds bm) and his ex step grandparents (bm's parents). His "bond" with them is because he manipulates them and gets whatever he wants from them. We have had him for 8 months straight with only a total of 2 week break (not consecutive). This child is very "entitled" and feels as though the world owes him. He can not follow rules and has some behavior issues. BF has taught him over the years that if he whines long enough he will get what he wants. Like the most recent case....he has whined for the last 2 months straight...saying things to his dad such as "I don't want you" I want to go live with my grandma." So he whined enough that BF has bought a one way ticket to grandmas who lives in another state (this is ex step grandma...where ex step mom lives in same house as well) yanking him out of school here and putting him in school there. His BM lives on the other coast and is 9 months pregnant (she is married and ready to give birth at any moment) is not able to take him right now otherwise BF said he would be skipping "grandmas" house and sending him straight there (HIS BM is scheduled to pick him up in July). So, now that he knows he has gotten what he wants (who cares what this has taught my daughter...just whine enough and you will eventually get your way) now I get to hear everyday how much more fun grandmas house is. How much more fun his "mom" (ex step mom is) and how much better everything is there. Needless to say, his ex step mom is still BF daughter's bm, and definitely NOT the saint he makes her out to be. Meanwhile I get to hear about how wonderful this woman is while I fold ss laundry, cook his meals, fix his toys, clean up after him..you get the picture. Everytime he even mentions her I feel my blood boil. I really despise this woman and to hear him talk about her as though she gods gift drivesme insane.....last night it got so bad that I had to lock myself in my bedroom just to get away from it. SS said to BF last night..."I get to leave cause I'm tired of you right?" And "I don't have to come back during the summer ever right?" My BF loves this child (no bond but he still loves him) and BF was really upset about these comments. He knows they hurt BF and we are not sure why he wants to hurt BF. Thing is is that I should not care what he says to me or how he feels about anything...he is out of my hair in 5 days. But, that still does not answer my question of the sd's bm (ss ex step mom).....how can I even consider marrying this man when SHE will be a constant in my life for the next 18+ years? I am truely considering leaving because of the mere fact that I do not want this woman to be a part of my life forever. I don't want BF to feel as though I blame the fact that he has kids as to why we can't be...and it isn't the kids fault..but I am the only one in this situation that has the choice as to who I want in my life...her not being one of those people. So my question is this...how do you get past it? How do you get past the fact that she will forever be a part of your life?